.[breathes in deeply] ok
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, missb is back :D
She is a wonderful, amazing person. One, who genuinely cares.
I could go on. and on but I don´t want to embarass her. You will get to know her soon enough :) . She is a SoulCaster, who speaks her own mind!
What I would do instead is relate how my day was before I got so weeeeeeeeeeeee at finding the first post of missb after more than a year´s absence...
I was here almost the whole day in SC...
My current situation is so complicated to go into now, please bear with me if I don´t reply to some questions, that might arise after reading the account of my day. Perhaps soon...because I don´t dwell on my own situation myself too much now! Just trying very hard to live day by day...
. . .I was busy the whole day preparing the flat for a spontaneous visit of someone dear.
The night before was not easy for me because little one has been off to granny since Wednesday for a week visit with still husband (I was reading through wishy´s blog and stumbled upon her terminology was-band, lol... I definitely need a better term than the current one I am using!).
I hardly slept because the little one missed a lot of feeding, and my swollen mammary glands were a source of utter pain and discomfort. And even now, as I type. the breast are begging for cold compress once again. Talk about literal painful separation from my baby!
The girls slept in my room; they felt care-free with the absence of their father, and so excited with the news that someone who have won their hearts more than a year ago would be greeting them good morning today before they set off for school. Their shining, gleeful expectant eyes made my heart go warm and fluttery.
We will savour every minute of the short visit. It wont be an effort to do so, our visitor never fails to make us girls laugh and giggle uncontrollably, without even trying.
So, it was disconcerting to wake up panicky this morning. I tried to calm myself several times, and say... hey, think think think as you... you decide... - this will not make sense now for readers but writing this now will help me write in the future (as memory aid), and I am so happy I am writing again. It is still laborious process but I have said before... I am forging on.
I had to drag myself the whole day to do one little thing after another. I utilised SC, like I did 2 years ago, and let it keep me company while I do one chore after another.
I have been counting the days actually, not wanting to miss marking my second year here in SC like I missed celebrating my first year.
Although I was not visible and was mainly a SoulCast Ghost lurking in the halls of SC in the year 2007, I felt very connected to everyone who joined that year and made the community alive.
I discovered SoulCast indirectly through MySpace September 2006. I will chronicle the details at another time, in another blog. Please, alllow me to jump right away to opening the SC site for the first time . . .September 26, 2006
The Gift by Jenna
This was the first post I read in SC. I am so delighted that it still exist! As you know, the whims of an average SoulCaster - back in 2006 it was to delete blog randomly... now, two years later we wonderfully have the option of draft!
After reading this post, I combed through Jenna´s blogs, and I felt like I came home to a wonderful feeling that I could not put a finger too.
Below is the first comment I ever posted in SoulCast in Jenna´s , River Trip? blog from September 23, 2006, when I finally found the courage to jump right in with commenting. . .
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PAPERBACKWRITER said
on Oct 01, 2006....
WOW!!!What a ride!
I just recently got on the boat of SoulCast and the first message in
the bottle that I read was Jenna´s The Gift. It completely fascinated
me. And a lot of the comments warmed my heart.
Well, I just followed your trail up to here dear Jenna and hopped on the boat. Hope you don´t mind?
Words play a great role to my personal healing. Personal words uttered
by trusted friends and yes, kind strangers made me survive.
Learning from experience, I know the only way to return the kindness I was blessed with is to give them to others.
I do hope, I could inspire and bring others peace, the way I felt after
reading your words, dear Jenna...thanks for the ride (gingerly getting
off the boat, waving goodbye, silently wishing there will be more boat
trips to come)!
Jenna said
on Oct 01, 2006....
Welcome dear one...I hope you enjoy the ride here at soulcast. I look
forward to reading more about you!...I am glad you enjoyed The Gift.
And yes there are so many wonderful people here to read and support
you.
love to you!
Thus, I nicknamed her Godmomsie! What could be more apt :). She indirectly welcomed me with The Gift...and from then on has been a very steady support to my journey here in SC, if not in comment, I feel her spirit here... always.
missb, paved the path to my comeback in SC after I got emo, deleted my posts, and went silently away...Remember your birthday blog, missb? :D ... almost end of November 2006?
Then came the a long silence, where I was here but silent only commenting and posting sporadically if ever. In April 2007 juicy Lucy said hello, and I was reminded to do my part as a member of the community ... I have the right to remain silent but a hello will not hurt me, as a matter of fact, I was received with so much warmth and well wishes! One might be invisible but will always remain in the hearts of friends.
And finally in January 15, 2008 a simple blog Paper Seeks Polly, enabled me to overcome a difficult year in my life.
In the series of many hellos that made it easy, to jump back again in the life that is SoulCasting - to share myself here and to make it more easier to accept myself, these ladies made an indelible ink in my SoulCast life...
I thank you all friends in SoulCast for the wonderful 2 years and I thank these special generous ladies for the special welcome, the special hello, that made a difference...
In this spirit, I urge you to please visit your favourite blogger, who has been MIA for a while and say hello via comment and PM, it might make a difference, we would never know until we do!I am so excited, I don´t know where to begin. LOL
