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Delusions of grandeur.....

I'mNotHungry posted on Sep 22, 2008 | views: 141 | Tags: I Care, SI, dont care
Seriously, I think I've been suffering from delusions of grandeur - like a fucking book or a recording is going to fucking help.
Give me a break!
None of it matters - none of it is real - I don't care - you don't really care... I mean really, deep down - you don't either.
So why not just stop pretending.
I can't be helped.
I was, am, and always will be an unlovable fuck up.
SI hiatus now over!


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Comments

  • cuppajava said on Sep 22, 2008....
    Hi - I have told you this already - somebody does care - I CARE -you need to realise that there are people out there who DO care about you,and who ARE prepared to help you in ANY way that they can.All YOU have to do is LET THEM.You need to take a big step back from this whole situation and take a deep breathe and think clearly about where you are,and where you are going.I hope that you have NOT started that SI thing again.Please dont.
  • Mamie said on Sep 23, 2008....
    I care too.
  • vacantmind said on Sep 23, 2008....
    I do care but, it doesn't really matter. I am less important than you when it comes to this situation. No matter what my true feelings are they hold no weight when it comes to what you want to do or what you believe. The only person that will ever hold power over you...is you. I just hope at some point that you will be able to care enough for yourself to cherish the life you have been given. I hope in time that you learn to love and nurture yourself so, that you can pass that on to your daughter.
  • hotaka said on Sep 24, 2008....
    I care enough to read what you write and I cheer for your small victories because I hope they will eventually lead you to success. When I read posts like this one I just think that you have lost a battle and you are counting your wounds but the war isn't over yet. I don't know what it is like to be in a situation such as yours but through you I can learn and I know there are no simple steps. I came here to read your latest post today because I was wondering how you were doing. Maybe the next time I will see a turn for the better. If not, I will still check up on you when time permits. As for how you felt when you wrote this post I can understand the need to say "Screw it all to Hell coz it doesn't matter anyway." Sometimes I think it's best to get that out of your system so you can focus on what does matter and work on what needs to be done.

    Btw, I have come to the conclusion that most if not all adults are fucked up one way or the other. Just some manage to live a life where their fucked up side doesn't have a chance to show. No one is "normal". No one is without pain.

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