according to popular belief people view me as , happy bright little girl, that hops and jumps instead of walking, and is always with smile. The ones who aren't bothered enough to know me, would either call me stuck up or with attitude, or would think that I'm just uncool. Usually what I think to myself is , that I'm an interesting book that no one would bother to pick up and read because the cover is seemingly dull. Only the few that who thinks I'm worth the shot, actually end up thinking so. Sad but true. Also yes, I do suffer from low self esteem, pertaining to my outside appearances. I just think that I'm " ok " looking.

anyway, I'm in a new place of work. It's alright. It's been two months, and I'm not the kind of person that tries to fit in, but think that my school friends are enough. I still don't believe that true friendship or even just friendship can exist in the corporate world .Hence I still dont have a single friend here. Maybe that's why I'm a tad bit sad today. That I'm barely noticed. People don't remember me, remember my name, remember that I asked if I could have lunch with them cuz I hate to eat alone. It happened for the millionth time today when a co-worker "forgot" to invite me to have lunch, despite of the request I made. I really feel so depressed and left out. It's horrible to feel this way. I'm just always the little reject, the one that no one seems to remember, and it's always me who goes , "hey you remember me ?", and the response Id get is a blank stare! It's a sad life!!!!