• gingersoul said on Sep 12, 2008....

  Burney.....it happens to everybody...and when it happens you might feel wronged and promised "Never again".
   
  But you know what? There is a high chance that there is going to be another time.......its called life, opening up, trying to make connections.
   
  Its a risk to run because sometimes it doesn work the way we hoped.
   
  And its not necessarily your fault.
   
  But the risk of betting burned is well worth it because when you do finally find that someone (friend or lover or coworker) that really gets you and reciprocate you is just a great feeling....
   
  Just keep trying. Good luck!
   
   

• secretlife said on Sep 12, 2008....

  yeah, it hurts-
  but i say that person isn't worth all the worry.....
  you tried.  that's the best you can do.
   
  but every person is different, so don't give up on the human race just cause there's a few bad eggs....

• BurnedOut said on Sep 12, 2008....

  hey ginger....yeah...just a little pissed off.   I'm just being a little baby who got his feelings hurt a little.  I realize that:-)  Even though you're right....I'm sure I'm going to be feeling this way for some time.  lol
   
  secretlife...yeah...maybe this happened because I kinda put my heart into it a little where I shouldn't have to begin with.  So, I think I probably deserved it. 

• secretlife said on Sep 12, 2008....

  nah, it's not about whether you deserved it or not.  if you offer your hand in friendship,  and someone just isn't interersted, then that doesn't reflect badly back on you-  it only says that you tried.
   

• gingersoul said on Sep 12, 2008....

  I am with Secret......its not a matter of deserving it....it just happened.....and you are not a little baby showing this hurt......hope it heals soon...:-) 

• BurnedOut said on Sep 12, 2008....

  secret and ginger.....thanks to the both of you.  Yeah...I just have to put it behind me and just let it go:-)

• polarheart said on Sep 12, 2008....

  MrBurned, I send you big (((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))
   
  Polar x

• fearing said on Sep 12, 2008....

  Should I take this personally - or tell the paranoid voices in my head to shut-up?  lol!
  
  Just trying to make you smile.  I hope everything is fine now.
  

• MissMimi said on Sep 12, 2008....

  I understand completely, MrBurned.  Makes me want to become a hermit --- with barbed wire and big dogs patrolling my mountain.

• starchini said on Sep 12, 2008....

  Brush it off...keep lending ur hand.  Those people are little blips in a much more important picture...you!  Its important to help others, wether they want it or not is up to them but no matter how many times people pass it up, remember that u offered and ur a better person for it.  One day there will be that one person u were gonna help but remembered the other unappreciative people and decided not to and that person will die or commit suicide at u will feel aweful....ya know?  Hey, it could happen..

• RollingC said on Sep 12, 2008....

  I hear you Burn....common courtesy should be a mandatory course in high school.
  Don't let it change you however...you won't be sorry years on down the road.
  :^)
  Rc
  

• christmasglee said on Sep 12, 2008....

  It happens to me and I tell myself why should I even care....? Thus, you shouldn't. Don't let anyone ROB you of your self-esteem :) 

• silver_phoenix said on Sep 13, 2008....

  this happens to me all the freakin time! it's a total pisser. what i've ended up doing is not returning their calls. i'm tired of being used. so instead i don't get emotionally involved (in friendships). and i've figured out a way to get involved with guys and not become overly-emotional/over-analytical.

• BurnedOut said on Sep 13, 2008....

  Wow, I was pleasantly surprised by how many comments I saw when I logged in.  I never get this many in one night...but thanks to all of you guys commenting.  Made me feel much better!!

   

  polar....hey thanks for the big hug....I can never turn one down...especially when I could use one.  Great timing:-)  right back at you!!  Where have you been??

   

  Fearing...I think you should tell the paranoid voices in your head to shut up...lol.  You might want to get that "issue" checked out :-)  But you did make me smile.  Thanks!!

   

  MissMimi....yeah...that's pretty much how I felt.  And that's exactly what I wanted to do.  I don't know why it affected me as much as it did.  Am I being a little baby?? lol

   

  Starchini...dammit...now I'm gonna HAVE to help out everyone, thinking to myself "you're not committing suicide on my watch".  lol.  I didn't know whether to laugh or to real heed your warning.  Thanks for the everylasting guilt trip:-)

   

  Rolling C...I agree with you 110%.  But yeah...I'm not gonna let it change me, like you said.  But, it just leaves a sour taste in your mouth, you know?

   

  Christmas....thanks so much for the understanding!!  Yeah, self esteem and self-respect!!  I like to tell myself that I'm not gonna bother ever again, but unfortunately my personality is such that I'm a magnate to anyone that needs "help".  

   

  silver...yeah, tell me about it.  I'm a sucker.  I allow this to happen each time and I end up losing respect for myself more and more. 

   

  okay, everyone....there's a bit of info I purposely left out.  But, I might as well let you guys know.  The person I was talking about in my blog happened to be this new girl at work.  Very beautiful, and her personality is incredible.  I was asked by our management to walk her around and help her get acquanted with her job and her co-workers.  We were laughing and joking all day long.  In a flirtatious sort of way.  At the end of the day, we said our goodbyes and said how much fun it was.  The next day, she started her job with our company, and we said hello.  I asked how everything was going.  Typical conversation.  I swear I must've watched her every move from the time she came in till the time we left.  Well, yesterday, she acted like she didn't even know me.  To be honest, I'm not used to that at all.  She never said Hi, didn't bother to say bye on the way out, as she passed me. 

   

  I wasn't expecting anything more out of this new found friendship, but I guess I was a little hurt.  The thing is I'm married, and it was my fault for even being the TINIEST bit flirty.  So, I think I probably deserved it.  Would I have been that friendly and helpful if it was somebody else?  Honestly, I doubt it.  And that's where I realize I was wrong. 

• pusscat said on Sep 13, 2008....

  Hi Burn
  
  I still don't think that what you did gives anyone the automatic right to be rude.  Not using good manners I do consider rude.  If I had thought you were being flirtatious with me and then found out afterwards that you were married, I would still not have completely ignored you.  All men and women at some point can be flirtatious married or not.  A simple hello and goodbye from this woman would not have been leading you on either. 
  
  That aside , I'm glad to read that you are not going to change who YOU are.  It's strange to find this post after a conversation i had the other day with my line supervisor.  She is a very, very wise lady.  I was talking about how I will offer a certain work colleague to use my milk that I bring in for my cereal if ever she found herself without any.  I always make her a drink when I have one.  I take her bags full of the insides of toilet rolls as they are great for her gerbils to nibble on (instead of their cage LOL).  When she had a nasty cough, I offered to answer the phones all day so she didn't have to.  In return, when she is well, I get her not answering the phone when I have just taken 3 calls in a row and am trying to write the messages in the book.  She never offers to make me a drink - I mean EVER!.  When I was having a bit of a low day, you know those days where little things seem to erk you?  Well I was showing that I was darned annoyed that someone had, for the umpteenth time, left the empty toilet roll inner on the holder and not bothered even telling anyone there was no toilet roll in there.  If I had at least known I could have taken several in from our cupboard.  I later learned that the same person I had been so nice to for so long was making faces behind the door at my rant.  It really is a good job thinking about it now that I hadn't known at the time in the mood I was in!
  
  My supervisor told me that, no matter what I did or how I acted, I could not make someone act the same back.  You can't make someone be nice.  She said that it would be such a shame if I were to change because of someone else's actions and attitude.  She told me not to judge people by how I act towards others but to accept that some people can not be as nice to others as I am.  I thought it was very good advice.  Why should I change.  The most important thing is that I will NOT be annoyed when she does not act nicely.  I will no longer be shocked or amazed by it either.  If I make a drink I will make her one too as I am not that petty but I will not go so far as to actually put myself out any more.  If there is no milk for her I will remain silent.  When the gerbils run out of the rolls I will not be taking any more in.  I know she will notice it but, because of her attitude towards me, she will not say anything but she will realise what I DID do for her for so long.
  
  
  

• BurnedOut said on Sep 13, 2008....

  hey pussycat....thank you for your comment!  Wow, that coworker definitely disrespected you bigtime.  That's way worse than ignoring you.   That's more like taking advantage of you.  I can definitely see why you would act that way.  That's the approach I'm gonna take.  Just ignore her completely.  I mean, I only know her for like 3 days.  so, it's not enough to make a big issue out of, I should've realized that.  She's really nobody to me actually.  Thanks so much for you advise though!!

• polarheart said on Sep 13, 2008....

  MrBurned, one of my favourite quotes is "No matter how beautiful she is, some other guy is sick and tired of all her shit!"
   
  How true :-)
   
  Polar xox
  PS: I have just been busy with my own shit. . .you know. . .same old, same old! LOL!

• BurnedOut said on Sep 13, 2008....

  polar...that actually is a funny quote....but true, I'm sure:-)  Thanks for just making me laugh there.  haha.  Good one.  Okay, now I'm gonna verbally plagarize that quote the next time a friend of mine gawks at a hot girl.  Is that ok with you??  lol  I should actually write that on my own forearm to remind myself as well:-)  Good to hear from you...I hope everything is well:-)

• polarheart said on Sep 13, 2008....

  I am ok, MrBurned, just coasting along. . .we'll see where the current takes me ;-)

• fearing said on Sep 13, 2008....

  @Polar, That quote is hilarious!  I will pass on that information to "M" from you.  lol! 
  

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