There are people in this country that genuinely want to help people get ahead in life.  There are others that want to push people down into the mud.  I am one of those people who is truly getting attention from both sides.  Sometimes all I can see is the despair that I feel due to something that someone has done or said to me.  Then I do dumb things, like overdose.  It's obvious that it's not my time to go yet.  I'd be dead already if it were.  I feel aggravated and can relate to the feelings in some of the rock music that I hear.  I know that I'm not alone in this fight to stay alive.  Other people have to fight the hatemongers too.  I have dealt with someone online that has been trying to stop me from posting publicly.  I guess they are afraid of what I might let flow through my mind and from my typing fingers.  They want to control me for some strange reason.  They don't seem to like what I let fly.  I have let my anger come through in many ways, due to the abuse that I have had to endure over the years.  If I have to continue fighting for what I believe in, then fine.  I get depressed and want to die half of the time, but still breathe.  We all have to answer to someone in the end.  I know what I do.  I wonder if the rather sadistic human being that hacks my computer, screws up certain emails, and blocks me from certain sites that I know I did nothing wrong at.  See, I am labeled a Schizophrenic.  I think that person or group of individuals is taking advantage of that fact while making my life even more difficult than what it has to be.  It's just one more service that the human race (generalized) has to offer.  It seems that it's "Hurt or be hurt."  Oh well.  I know exactly what I can do with my time.  It's a constant fight.  They are trying to use The Art of War tactics on me by wearing their enemy down.  I read the freaking book.  I'm not stupid.  If a fight is what they want, that's definetely exactly what they recieve.  I have rights and so does everyone else.  This blog is for public rants, which is one way to fight.  Freedom of Speech is important.  Don't allow anyone to take that away.