beyondtheveil's tags:
Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall -
clumsy bastard.


Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet,
eating her curds and whey, along came a spider,
sat down beside her,
she jumped up & stomped shit out of it.


Jack & Jill went up the hill,
to fetch a pail of water,
Jack came down with nary a crown,
but Jill earned a dollar & a quarter.

Jack be nimble,
Jack be quick,
Jack jumped over the....
Jack walks differently now.


Hickory dickory dock,
three mice ran up the clock,
the clock struck one,
the other two escaped with minor injuries.


Mary had a little lamb,
its fleece was white as snow,
it followed her to school one day,
and a big dog fucked it.


......beyond's gonna go drink a beer - he needs it..........


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Comments

  • PAPERBACKWRITER said on Sep 05, 2008....

    Tooooooooo funny, beyond! Just what I needed to unwind :)

    Enjoy your beer!  As the Germans say, prost!

    paper ~


  • Fallyn said on Sep 05, 2008....
    mary had a little lamb

    with mint jelly
    and mashed potatos
  • PAPERBACKWRITER said on Sep 05, 2008....

    (giggles at Fallyn´s rhyme :D... inspiring!)


    Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall.
    Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
    All the King´s Horses, and all the King´s Men...had scrambled egg on toast


  • secretlife said on Sep 05, 2008....
    LOL....you're in a mood today, huh?
     
    i know an old lady who lived in a shoe
    she had so many children
    she now wears a chastity belt....
  • uniquely-ironic said on Sep 05, 2008....
    Seen these, they sound vaguely german to me ;)
  • botoni said on Sep 05, 2008....

    The cow's in the meadow,

    the sheep's in the corn.

    Where's Little Boy Blue?

    Under the haystack with Little Bo Peep.

  • lionesss said on Sep 05, 2008....
    Hahahahahahahaha soooooooooosoooooo funny........
    enjoy the beer,
    my bestmate pusscat knows some brill jokes she has some on a post take a look im sure she wont mind, thats if you dnt mind me telling you,, have fun.....
    lionesss x
  • evil_twin said on Sep 05, 2008....
    That last one especially cracked me up. I was not expecting that! This was hilarious.

    -evil_twin LA
  • RollingC said on Sep 05, 2008....
    That was funny.  
    The last one I've heard as.......... Mary had a little lamb,
                                                    boy were the doctors surprised !
                                                    But when Old McDonald had a farm,
                                                     the doctors nearly died !
     
    Now the kids in school have been making up ones about Batman:
                                                       Jingle bells, Batman smells,
                                                        Robin laid an egg,
                                                        Batmobile lost a wheel
                                                        And the Joker got away...
                                                         Hey....................(repeat)
    and there's more but I forget the rest.
     
    :^p
     
    Rc
  • hotaka said on Sep 06, 2008....
    Little Jack Horner
    Sat in the corner
    And only young boys know what he was really doing

    Ding Dong Bell
    Pussy's in the well
    Who put her in?
    Little Johnny Green
    Who never knew how to treat pussy well anyway

    Georgie Porgie pudding and pie
    Kissed the girls and made them cry
    When the boys came out to play
    Georgie realized that he was gay

    Jack Sprat could eat no fat
    His wife could eat no lean
    And so betwixt them both you see
    They licked the platter clean
    And for crying out loud, with the money they saved on cutlery you'd think they could buy proper dish soap and a cloth to clean that friggin' platter.
  • PAPERBACKWRITER said on Sep 06, 2008....

    LOL

    I always say above rhymes (in their original form :P ) to my girls in the playground, dear hotaka :) when we are on the swings or see-saw ... now how can i do that again without laughing hysterically!

    hope you are having a nice week-end :)

    <3
    papery ~
  • queenparanoia said on Sep 06, 2008....
    wahahhahahaahahha you guys are funny!!!!!!!!!
  • quietone said on Sep 06, 2008....

    Rub a dub dub, 3 men in a tub......... need I say anymore???

  • MissMimi said on Sep 06, 2008....
    LMAO  funny funny funny!  I needed to laugh this afternoon and this fit the bill perfectly!
  • hotaka said on Sep 08, 2008....
    RollingC, that Batman one goes back to my elementary school days.

    Handy Pandy Jack-a-Dandy
    Loved plum cake and sugar candy
    He five-fingered in a candy shop
    And was arrested on the spot
  • RollingC said on Sep 08, 2008....
    I heard it first from my nephews....I really have no idea when or how long it's been going around...
     
    Rc
  • one_wired_kitty said on Sep 09, 2008....
    LOL

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