so he did it again. partied away a whole lot of money. and its time for me to go.  no one can imagine how incredibly sad this all is.  my god, i've waited for him to change and he never will. people don't change. but maybe that's not true.  ive changed.  and its so sad to face that truth too. im so tired of this, being alone and so lonely. crying myself to sleep every night....im so tired of this life.  his text message read......"i know your mad but im at work."  wow.....ok...and im at work with no way home.  again.  fuck.....hhhhhhhhhh.......again  i had to ask for a ride.  they wouldn't let me call a cab. 

so i tried to call my friend for a ride and there was no answer on the cell.  perhaps its best that way.  i just fucking give up.  i give up....tomarrow i get off at 3. time to apartment shop i guess.  how am i gonna afford this.....oh my god......oh my god i think he does this intentionally.......oh my god