I started writing this at four-something this morning, my body still believing it's five hours later.  And I've been sat here for hours trying to sort out my thoughts and put them all down.  It's not as easy as it seems sometimes.  So much happened, so many wonderful memories, and yet I'm hurting beyond words right now because I miss her so much.  I want to be with my soulmate, touch her, feel her against me.  I want to kiss her, and show her how much I love her...

It was a long flight there, having left Friday night and not arriving until Saturday morning.  I hardly slept on the flight out, too keyed up to rest, looking forward to being with my beloved.  And my mobile phone didn't work once I left the country, so I couldn't even call her to tell her I'd landed.  The line through Customs and then to find my luggage seemed to take forever, and I was growing more and more impatient.  But I made it through finally.  And there she was...

I quickly searched the small crowd gathered at the reception area, anxious and nervous, my heart pounding loudly.  But when my eyes found hers, it was like time slowed down for a moment, just for us.  All I could see was her.  All that mattered was that she was suddenly in my arms, and I held her tight.  Her eyes shone so brightly when I looked into them.  I can't even begin to describe how good it felt to touch her, hold her in my arms again, to be able to kiss her after so long...

I remember how nervous she was driving down the motorway.  It probably didn't help matters that I wanted to touch her, hold her hand.  I ended up keeping my hand on the seat next to her leg (occasionally caressing her thigh and getting a very stern reprimand to let her drive without distractions).  I will admit, it took me a while to get used to being on the opposite side of the road.  But Alyss is an excellent driver and I knew I was in good hands the whole time.

It was all so new and different, being with her in her home.  And yet, it was all so familiar and comfortable and...right.  Figuring out where everything was and how she did things was more like remembering than learning.  We made meals together, we talked and laughed, we touched and kissed.  It was absolute bliss.

Seeing the sights was fun, but I know it wouldn't have been the same if I wasn't there with my soulmate.  I wanted to be there with her.  And I tried to tell her, show her that at every opportunity.  There were happy walks through impressive castles, beautiful gardens, along the river, through quiet museums, down crowded city streets, all hand in hand.  There was grocery shopping.  There was ice cream.  There was lunch on the grass.  And there were foot rubs when we sat quietly on the couch with her legs up on my lap, and back rubs later on.  Gods, how I miss touching her... 

So many happy memories.  So many special moments.  So many little surprises, many of them special, and a few not so good ones too.  But we handled it all together.  And we have a  small list of our 'comedy of errors' too. ;-)   I could go on for a few more hours writing about all of it, but I think I shall wait for now.  Maybe I'll post some more later on.

Saying goodbye at the airport was painful.  After being able to be with her nearly every moment, the sudden separation was very hard to deal with.  And I wish I didn't have to come back here, to this one bedroom apartment.  It's hard to call this place 'home'.  Not when I've experienced what home should feel like with my beloved.

I love you, my beloved Alyss.  And it will not be long before I can hold you in my arms again...