Went somewhere kickass on a mini-roadtrip today. Well... over the night. There aren't any Sonic food places around here so we were going to go find one of those, but left too late. So instead, me and two friends corpse-painted up our faces and went to this cute little town with an awesome name. Took pictures, like tourists lol, in front of signs and things. It was fun though.
    It was really nice just to be out on the road again. I miss road trips so much. When I had a girlfriend and a boyfriend in the military, I was always out on trips to see them. We drove through states and I took a plane one time. It was really nice to go see other places, just visit somewhere I had never been before.
    Soon, me and my bff are going to take a train. That'll be sweet. And I think I'll be able to talk the friends I went with today into a longer road trip. Maybe one day I'll even get my not-so-kinda-bf to go with me.

    One day, I'm going to travel to all different countries. All the time.

    When me and my not-so-kinda started seeing each other, I would always try to talk him into pawning everything he owned with me and jumping on a plane. He didn't really take me seriously until I started calculating how much I could get, lol. But I really had wanted to. He'd tell me he had to work and I'd say, "You wouldn't have to go to work if you'd leave the country with me."

    I miss that. Being so cute and weird.

    That reminds me! I put my face through one of those painted wood boards with the hole for your face and made my friend take a picture. I was giggling and being weird and he told me, "It's people like you that make me look forward to having children." And I realized that whenever I'm in a positive mood, I'm pretty childish. lol. I miss it.

    It must've been easy for my not-so-kinda to forget why he started dating me since I've been in this depression for a couple months. I want to get out of it so badly, but no matter what I do, I just keep failing. I miss being joyful and childish and giddy.
    At the beginning of our relationship it was easy to feel like that. But then I just had to keep putting in this effort and not getting a whole lot back. It drained me. I don't think thats why I'm depressed, but it sure made it easier. I wonder if he realized that at all?


Oh well. I wish I was traveling. I don't need to have a relationship if I can have the road.