I felt better after talking to him.  He thinks I need some time alone. Time to focus on myself and getting my head back together. He's right of course, but I didn't want to hear that.
I want to have hope.
I want to hear that there's a chance. And while he mentions past feelings etc, he doesn't say that he still feels that way.
He did say I need to lose weight. fucker. of course he mentioned he wants to lose a few too.
I love him so much it hurts. I've loved him since we were 16 and those thoughts have never left my mind. 10 years.
I can wait a few more months. I could wait another year or two if I must.