cuppajava's tags:
I know i will come back and explain a bit more of this later,but just a question for now.
If there was ever anything about your life that you would want to change - what would it be?
Would it be your habits,your attitude to life,your partners,your friends,your job....anything
What would it be ?
And why .................

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Comments

  • pusscat said on Aug 09, 2008....
    I used to think there were many things CJ that I would change i.e. not losing my mum to cancer when I was 12, not being 'left to my own devices' for so long, not watching 2 generations of my family die so quickly and so young, wishing the Poll Tax had not come into force when I was 16 forcing me to leave school and find work and so not being able to continue my A level Art studies, not having worked in all those factories that damaged my back before I got into Administration, not being sexually assaulted by someone whom I thought was a friend.  There are so many more too.
     
    Now, I believe all those things made me who I am today; tolerant, fair, none-judgemental, caring, wanting to help others.  I know my mum would understand this next statement but, if she had not died and I had been 'wrapped in cottom wool', if I had not then been forced to go to work because of financial difficulties without her, if I had not had been to the 'school of hard knocks', I don't believe I would have the attributes and friends that I have today.
     
    The people I have met because of those changes in my life and the friends and experiences I have gained are priceless and I can now honestly say that I wouldn't change any of it for all the lottery wins in the world!
     
    pusscat
  • quietone said on Aug 09, 2008....
    I thought that sometimes I would like to change things.. a lot of things, but then if it was changed, I would not be ther person I am today.  Life is ever changing as we go along our journey anyway. 
  • skald said on Aug 09, 2008....
    No. not a thing. Also the mistakes, I would do them again. 
  • Lucytorial said on Aug 09, 2008....
    If I were honest CJ it would be to change the way that I have loved over the years.... sometimes I let love in when I shouldn't and never feel its warm embrace but in fervent words or from afar. 
  • polarheart said on Aug 10, 2008....
    Hi Cuppa, this is a very interesting question.  I agree with Pusscat. . .I think all the stuff I have done and gone through has shaped the person I am today. . .the good and the bad, so its hard to say. 
     
    But if I did have a "wand" I would have liked to have had a dad who had not been alcoholic and I would have liked to still have my mother alive today.
     
    If I knew at age 28 what I know now, I would have fallen pregnant then and not at age 33.  That is about the only thing I would change, but then again there are no guarantees that we would have been able to conceive.
     
    So I am brought to believe that my life is where it is because this is my path.  Its not always easy, but I think I may just survive.
     
    Polar :-)
  • scipio said on Aug 10, 2008....
    Change is the only thing that is constant. No point in regretting what you cannot change or could have changed when you had the opportunity to do so for better or for worse. What is done is done and what is finished is finished. Pick up the pieces, learn a lesson and move on - If you don't - you will get trampled by the vagaries of time.
  • cuppajava said on Aug 10, 2008....
    PC - I believe we are made to go through experiences such as yours to make us the people we are today too.Maybe it has been decided that we need to be 'toughened up' in certain aspects of our character and we are faced with situations that we sometimes have little control over and just have to deal with.

    Quietone - I think that we are all tempted to change at least one thing - even if we wouldn't like to admit it - but then are apprehensive of the repercussions of making that change,and then tend to hang back and 'play safe'

    Skald - In a way,sometimes i agree - but it depends on what the mistake was.I know that I have a few that I would like to change.I think honestly speaking - if i could go back to the age of 8 again - there are a lot of things i would have done differently in my child hood and at school that would have given me a better chance at a more fulfilling career.

    Lucy.........Love can be such a wonderful thing,but sometimes we only realise too late that our choice of love was the wrong one.But how is it possible to love anyone a little 'less' - rather than not at all?
    I do agree though.I had a relationship with someone about 20 years ago,and she used me totally and practically stole every cent that I had - now thats something that I would LOVE to change

    Polar -  a statement said many times by,I am sure, many people - 'if i had known then.........." sometimes we make decisions on how to handle things based on what we know,what we feel and what we see.The decision about when to fall pregnant is never an easy one - I have known couple who have tried for over 10 years and not been able to conceive,and then  i know couples,like my brother and his wife,who were able to fall pregnant at the first time of trying,even though his wife was well passed a 'child bearing' age.Maybe it was  a higher powers way of telling you that He felt that you were not ready - dont get me wrong,i am not a religious someone by any means - but you have to look at it that way sometimes - especially when it concerns creation of life.

    Scipio - I tend to agree with your view on things...........its easier that way.



  • Ownedgalbabs said on Aug 10, 2008....
    CJ:

    In all honesty and included some of the things that have hurt me the most?  Really nothing.....for in doing so I would have run the risk of not having everything that I could have possibly  wanted right here and now.  The good and the bad, my life, is as it should be.

    The good reminding me that happiness is always near by and the bad, essential to ensure that I can distinguish them apart.

    Hugs,
    babs

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for my love....
There are many different types of deep rooted feelings, and it is easy enought to confuse one for the other, but letting that confusion last too long is a recipe for personal disaster......
Well, SC - I am teetering on the brink. It seems like I should be a lot more upset than I actually am, but I am taking consolation in the knowledge that I have done the absolute best that I could. Also, there's still a chance I can achieve the grades...

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