fri 1 aug 08
still the same, still the same...
i am still not human. in fact, i may have been demoted from worm to amoeba.
i am still homeless.
still sick, still tired, still accumulating critical volume, and all that.
still autistic. imagine that. it doesn't just go away because a whole lot of people wish it would. raging immune system doesn't just go away either.
and the neurotypicals won't just go away. they are still here. still ill-mannered, insensitive, shallow, controlling, never ever wrong, et cetera et cetera ad nauseam. my animals, my children, my friends are still and forever gone.
and i am still being repeatedly, unceasingly traumatized by secret traumatic events, absolutely without mercy from any quarter. is it really that hard to grasp why i loathe the human race? is it really?
carl jung said: show me a sane man and i'll cure him for you. well, i can't say i've seen anyone in a long time who's sane enough to need curing, except myself. in spite of autism and ptsd and depression and anxiety, i am the sanest person i know, the one the nt's like to call crazy.
hatred is a place called greenfield. hell is other people. the hollow men run everything, including me.



