Symbolism in any form fascinates me… I was recently reading about the very controversial Roman Polanski who is known for symbolism in the films he directed.
During the 60’s and early 70’s…way before my time BTW…he directed number of films…the underlying theme being the mind and how the respective protagonists were lead to commit acts of violence as a result of their thoughts and delusions.
Being a thinker this intrigued me as I spend a significant amount of time “in my head” so this got me thinking about the mind in terms of how our thoughts unconsciously motivate and drive our behaviour.
The first in the trilogy was Repulsion (1965) where a beautiful young woman, Carol, is living in London with her sister. Throughout the movie, she becomes progressively more troubled by the sexual overtures made by the men around her. Her sister plans a weekend away with her boyfriend in Italy, so Carol is left alone in her sister’s flat for the few days.
Carol’s mind becomes chaotic and delusional leading to her perpetrating two murders in defense of what she incorrectly perceives as sexually threatening behaviour from her boyfriend and subsequently the building’s caretaker. The flat she shares with her sister slowly develops into a dark and filthy manifestation of her mind and ultimately becomes her prison. A significant symbol is a dead rabbit which she initially intends to cook and eat but doesn’t. The rabbit goes through the various stages of decay…again suggesting the gradual disintegration of Carol’s mind.
This is extreme, I know…but it initiated thoughts around my own mind and how often I am held captive by it either by the way that I behave outwardly to those around me or inwardly towards myself…I almost feel incapable of not responding or reacting to my thoughts…whether the results of my actions or decisions ultimately benefit me or not.
My thoughts disturb me at times and I don’t see how a “normal” person is capable of thinking up what I do as I am sure most would be utterly repulsed. I carry such shame over these thoughts at times…I feel my mind is filthy and revolting and wish I knew what the basis of all the crap in there is…
I would be so interested to know how many other people are disturbed by their thoughts or whether they even have sick, dark thoughts that they would never admit to or share…or is it just me?
