Thong Cure
An Indian consulted his medicine man about a pain in his stomach that had persisted for three months.
"For something as long as that," said the Medicine Man, "I have a more drastic remedy than the herbs I normally prescribe. Chew on this leather thong every day. It is 31 inches long: chew one inch every day, and at the next moon come back."
The Indian dutifully did as directed, and at the next moon he returned to the Medicine Man.
"How do you feel?" the Medicine Man asked.
"The thong is ended, but the malady lingers on."