the guy has been staying with me for two weeks now. there may be another two weeks to go.
it fits.
its comfortable.
it's like living with myself.
we're both moderately slobby. not a ridiculous amount.....but just enough to not drive each other crazy with either neatness or filthiness.
we're both quiet people who don't mind being interrupted to be shared with.
we're both incredibly silly and love to laugh.
we like to tease each other.
we're both interested enough in new things to appreciate something the other is doing, or looking at. etc.
neither of us is picky. we can both easily adapt to a situation.
we've been sharing a bed. i am going to desperately miss the warmth of him next to me.
the few things that seem to be tenuous issues......if that's the term i'm meaning.
he likes to argue.....not about important things at ALL.....like NEVER.....actual real arguments are not something he does.....but more...debate i suppose.
but not like my ex.
i however have a fear of disagreeing with someone....so that makes it difficult.
i don't mind distance......i can love someone from afar.
he can't.
i'm emotionally available,
he isn't.....admittedly so.
and won't be till someone he can love is close to him in physical location.
regardless of that, i can feel the closeness of his heart.
it's awfully hard to deny feelings for someone who fits together with you so well.
there are other obstacles. which i am choosing not to look at right now.
*frown*
i love him.
but i'm trying to be open to someone else coming along.
my heart thinks my brain is stupid.
my brain thinks my heart is.
Fallyn posted on Jul 19, 2008
| views: 131
Comments
-
wishyouwerehere said on Jul 19, 2008....
Oh Fallyn - I can relate so well to what you have written. Not being able to make it last doesn't take away the wonderful of what you are experiencing ... do your best to live in the here and now and enjoy it while you can. None of us ever really knows what time will bring - Wish -
Fallyn said on Jul 19, 2008....
exactly.
it's so hard to do that.
i get sad.
i get freaked out too.
i started crying one night a couple nights ago cause he can't care about me the same way right now.
it's weird.
we're best friends, and super close....but he won't let himself do the whole mushy boyfriend girlfriend thing.....cause it hurts.
that's the only part missing.....the odd thing is.....how we are together is so much deeper than that.
if he can keep control of his emotions as we get closer and closer on that deeper level ....he's WAY stronger and WAY more in control of his emotions than anyone i've ever known. *frown*
i find myself plotting ways to be together......
me helping pay rent on an apartment i'd only use a few times a month for example. *frown*
my brain isn't very practical right now.
-
wishyouwerehere said on Jul 19, 2008....
LOL - Practicality flew right out the window on this end about a month ago ... it's totally our of character and completely amazing!Don't be so hard on yourself - it is our human nature to want to prolong pleasure. Just do your best to enjoy what you already have and you never know!BTW - I cried like hell at the airport when I had to leave Taran yesterday. Even wonderful hurts sometimes. Maybe it helps keep it all in perspective, who knows? Maybe we need the contrast to appreciate the good parts? -
I'mNotHungry said on Jul 19, 2008....
Fallyn,
I am so glad you are finding comfort and warmth right now. It's been awhile since I've been active on SC - so I need to read your other blogs to catch up with what's been going on with you.
I think I'll do that now - seems like a lit has changed.
I'm glad to *see* you again -
H.
-
Fallyn said on Jul 19, 2008....
hungry...oh, not a terrible lot....not even sure if i've explained the situation.
-
Fallyn said on Jul 19, 2008....
practicality is out of character? or the lack of?
lack of practicality is totally in character for me. :P
how wonderful would we feel if every day brought unbridled joy and no sadness whatsoever? i think after awhile we'd get used to it and take it for granted.
-
Lucytorial said on Jul 19, 2008....
Your last words ring truer than you may ever really know. Without struggle and sadness we are never really able to appreciate the true beauty of love, friendship and togetherness.
Okay seriousness aside **giggle**
Fallyns been getting a bit eh???
-
queenparanoia said on Jul 19, 2008....
ah love... it never seems easy right???
anyway my question, does he loves you the way that you love him?
-
serious said on Jul 20, 2008....
love isn't practical all the time
Comment on "comfort"
Related Posts:
killingme4u
posted 4 days ago
| views: 96
|
alright you all i'm finaly and actualy listening to othere's.keep it short i talked to my case manager awhile ago.and later today i'm going to sign a few paper's to see a new therapist.i know who they are and they said they'd take me on.but i am gonna be... read entire post
D6fer
posted 6 days ago
| views: 86
|
I was just looking at my subscribers list.....the first person that I subscribed to was momsrock.....I miss her.....her sense of humor was such a great asset to this site......... read entire post
Never_Mind_The_Quality
posted 6 days ago
| views: 201
|
When we chatted on line, I told her I wanted to walk with her again in ourcity and she asked with sad voice: "When?.. When it's Christmas?"........ read entire post
tizzygirl
posted 2 days ago
| views: 320
|
of happiness, joy, pleasure, pride, cheerfulness, delight, bliss, glee...I need more words anyone have a thesaurus?? :)... read entire post