As you know, we bought a house in May. With a wedding, baby and new house this year so far people are scrambling to bestow us with gifts for one celebratory event or another. A good friend of mine stopped by one evening to give me a housewarming gift. It was a large flat package that I knew would be a frame of something. I wondered what he had chosen. Was it a painting or photograph? Was it maybe just a frame so that I could enlarge and display one of my own photos?
After he left I opened the wrap. It was a painting, a certified reprint apparently, of a painting by a well-known artist. I didn’t know who he was nor did I know he was well-known. The painting was of a couple floating in the sky and holding each other. There was a horse with Picasso-like eyes and L’arc de triumph. There was other stuff too and maybe it would not have been so weird had it not been for the big blotches of red that looked like raw meat. One part that looked like it could be the horse’s legs was all meat red as was the woman’s dress. Meat. Raw steak! I thought it was hideous. I told my wife and showed her a photo I took with the digital camera.
What should we do with it? If we invite him over he will like to see the painting up somewhere. No doubt it was expensive as a certified authentic print. I couldn’t just remove the print and use the frame for myself. I left it by my entrance for a couple of weeks. After seeing it everyday I got used to it - basically I got used to ignoring it. Our bedroom has an empty wall where it would fit perfectly. Perhaps we could hang it there. I asked my wife. She wasn’t thrilled but shrugged her shoulders and agreed we could try to put it there.
When it comes to giving gifts, especially clothes and art, it is really important to know what the receiver likes. Though you may have an interest in something there is no reason to assume that your friend or relative will like it. Being forced out of politeness and manners to accept a painting I don't care for and feeling obligated to hang on my wall something I would have just walked by in the store is uncomfortable. I want to receive gifts graciously and return the favour. But this puts me in a pickle.
My parents once gave my wife some clothes for Christmas. The clothes were nice enough but not her preferred style. She never wore them and my mother asked some time later if she ever wore those clothes. She took offence to not seeing my wife (girlfriend at the time) wearing those clothes. I don’t think you should expect anyone to gladly wear clothes you give them if you don’t even get their opinion before buying it.
