last night at work i could have screamed and torn someone's head off. there a lot of morons where i work. it's factory work.......nuf sd........i work the graveyard shift .....actually i just got on that shift and it took some gettin used to.......i don't get off til 7am and by this morning i was dog tired and pretty mad........to begin with.........i went into work already a little t'd off......after the barbeque chicken fiasco.......i mean reallly......this one older black woman had wanted a plate for lunch and that night i heard she wasn't feeling well.....she had already paid me the five dollars for the food......i was told by her friend that she was going to take a late lunch......sooooo later on at next break i asked her....you know what how did you like the chicken.....damn her....i mean damn it her.....better...be nice me.....anywholoooooo....she told me she wasn't hungry and she was going to give her plate to her other guy friend......keep in mind that all these people are black and i'm a white woman trying to hustle up some money to help me with the food bill.....shit.....so the old bitch told me last night that she hade given hers to the crazy black guy......oh man and is he crazy.....i guess i'm mad at him most of all.....it was reallhy hard to get the five spot out of him in the first place and then he wanted onlhy chicken and then he wanted ........and it went on like that for a while and i finallhy told him .....look nod it's five dollars and you get what i put on your damn plate....i was right on the verge telling him forget it.....and believe me i will not do it again......i cooked a lots o' chicken....damn......shit......fuck.......scream.....man that not really gets under my skin.....if i was a guy i'd say that he really gets into my craw.....is that how it's said.......i douby if anyone else will read my blog.....dfdd....forgive me.....i worked all night last night and i think i just nodded off for a minute.    ....i am laying here in my bed and typing on the ol'lap.....my eyes are closed and you know it feels pretty goodd.....i always am thankful to myself for learning how to type while i was in high school. .....man what a class.....mostly girls of course........anywhooooooijj'm saying here with my eyes closed and im typing and im getting tired and i'm trying to keep my two index fingers gently touching the little bumps on the keys and telling my mind to begin there and alll the letters will follow and hyou will be able to type about ads fast as yhou can think...how about that....but ringy now m...ji....j...i'm pretty tired and my fingers seem to be invgoltarily typing on their own and adding letters now and then.....and i';ll be damned if i'm going to open my eyes and check my spelling.....b just came in a woke me a little.....all the wienie dogs 4 ran in here and jumped on the bed and woke me even more.....or, i probably wud have gon 2 sleep....i believe that i am going to create a short cut in this typing thing.....i can shorten some words 2...i just have to learn how to put in sum nbs insted of writing out everything.....okkkkkkkkkkkkk........what now......ok.....i work at a factory like i sd...it's hard work & it's very hot hot hot hot hto hot hot hot hot hot hot hot .....just practicing my typing.....why not....i am in a world wher i can write anything and it's completely annonymous kand you no what....i forgot what i was going to say.........46 years old and old timers lays on the fringes of my mind and and puts in a appearance now and then to remind me of my age....funny though i forget and each time it feels like the first time......kinda crazy i know.....but think  about it.....to go through life forgetting everygthing that has happened to yuou........b ad stuff......my god/........i cry.........what if that happens to me.......scream.....noooooooooooooo.......stay away ol' time.....there is always that hope inside that wishes that now will be tihe time........damn it's slipping away.......too tired i guess......but my mind ramble like that alll the time and i really likeke to  be able to write as fast as i can think that would be awesome and i think it is very possible.   but what would you put to the pen....when our ur conscious of what your doingd....whatever....just to get back to the writing and trying to keep up with my mind.....i talk to myself...when i theink i really talk like i'm talking to someone else.....is that dual personality or what......i thinnk everyone does that.....right.....what in the world would i do for action in my own mind.....my mind wonders......what do i want to think about....i'm thinking kinda slow triht  right now and trying to hit the right keys and type fast but still i'm slow.....but it's ok......if i keep it up i'lll be able to do it without evern thinking about it....and wosw......woswd.....wow.......wow.....wow....try do do that real fast...it feels like im sighning my named.....wow....wow.....wow.....now that i'm actually looking at what my hands are doing i can see that i have lots o'typo's.....not surprising at all.....surprised that i can write so much........when i get in the zone like that it's really weird........but it feels goodl......wow