• Ownedgalbabs said on Jul 03, 2008....

  Essential in every relationship, your tag, communication sounds like a good start.  The fact that he, however has failed to respond doesn't rest well.  Then again, I don't know your schedule, nor do I know you, apart from what you have written in your blogs. 
  
  Which I am sorry submissivepet, but even in this blog, you seem to want to be reassuring,  "I don't know why you guys are so worried, though, I'm ok."  But then by the time you reach its conclusion ,
  
   "i hope i did the right thing, taking the initiative. Maybe it was something i should have asked about first. The more i think about it the more i think i should have talked to Him first."
  
  You know maybe I am out of line, somehow over reacting....but you know, I would rather speak up and express my concern for your personal welfare than run the risk of remaining silent to only one day come here and read an account of something unmistakably abusive and or criminal.
  
  I could have posted this annonymously, submissivepet, but you know I am genuinely concerned about you and maybe, if you hear that often enough, you might pause for a moment and ask yourself, "what am I getting out this relationship?"  Does he know how you felt, then?  How you are feeling now?  Because I really don't think I am the only one now thinking about women who have been abused and how initially their self esteem and confidence is usually the first to suffer at the hands of a would be abuser.
  
  I am not trying to upset you, and ultimately you can dislike me....thats your choice, but I really am concerned, and though its your life to live as you choose,  I am not one to sit by when everything in my being screams, "red flag".  Please do take good care of you.
  
  Hugs,
  babs
  
  

• sweet_rose said on Jul 03, 2008....

  "Maybe it was something i should have asked about first"
   
  No dear girl... it is something he should of talked to you first about.
   
  You have a number of submissive sisters that are telling you something is wrong. We can't all be misunderstanding.
   
  You said yourself.. "it is the longest relationship you have ever had"
   Are you over weight, low self estem, single parent home, sexually abused, a social outcast to some people? There is more to your picture than you paint pet101. I am not sure you even realize it yet, and that is okay. That short list I wrote are just questions to help identify what is going on in your head. There are a lot of submissive that will answer yes to almost all of those. This lifestyle is a good way to either mask those things with pain and devotion to others(usually a dominant person).
   
  That is some food for thought for you pet101
   
  rose... who has been in your shoes, and is lucky to still be alive...

• DaddysLittleSlut said on Jul 03, 2008....

  The desparation and loneliness in your posts is just heartbreaking to me. And, i can't help picturing women i've know in the past with their bruised eyes, fat bleeding mouths, and internal bleeding saying to me "Really its ok, i started it.  I shouldn't have made him mad."
  One of them was my mother.  It took her 23 years to realize that she could survive without his love.
  You have not communicated with him to take care of you... you are only going further out of your way to take care of him.
  You're so young and on such a dangerous path. We are scared for you for a reason!!!
  dls

• pusscat said on Jul 04, 2008....

  Hello subpet
   
  You know I have always been in your corner and have never lied to you about anything.  I see the good in everyone  most of the time.  Rose knows that I think she can be quite harsh and would not mind me saying it here but, and it is a big but, Rose has been my saviour many a time :-)  She speaks as she sees it through love of her fellow subs.  She would say and do the same in the vanilla world too cos she cares deeply about people and their wellbeing.
   
  I am getting a little concerned my dear little friend.  Taking the initiative is never a bad thing for a sub to do.  Imagine if we only did things our Doms asked / told us to do?  We'd never do anything outside of the bedroom or kitchen!  Most Doms welcome a sub that has common sense and can take the initiative.  although His word is the final word, they still like us to come up with ideas and suggestions, to be creative within the relationship.  It's hard work being a Dom but your Dom doesn't seem to do any work at all on the relationship.   The only things I have ever seen you discuss is sex.  What about your mind?  Does he give you daily tasks to stretch you interlectually?  Does he punish you for things beyond your control?  Does he know what all your likes and dislikes are?  If he doesn't know what your fears are he can't help you to work past them.
   
  If I were your Dom I would have been very flattered and very proud of what you did for me - going out of your way to buy those things, to take the time to train and practice at something that I know is hard for you.  If for any reason I could not give you the long response I wanted to, I would have made sure you at least knew that I was pleased and communicated better with you when I could. 
   
  I don't want to be the one that rains on your parade darling but I do hope that you can asnwer some of the things I have put to you as someone that cares.  It does all seem to be one sided.  I know you are happy when you have pleased him but most men are easy to please sexually.  That goes in any lifestyle.  What is he doing to reassure you of your beauty within, your hidden strength, your initiative and creativity?  What does he do that can help you face an ever changing harsh world?  Please prove me wrong subpet when I say I am so worried.  There is a wonderful new D/s community called fet.com that I am a member of online.  There are some marvellous subs and Doms, Masters and Switches there, all looking for friends or partners or just wanting to post like we do here.  Nowhere on there have I read of a sub treated so off handed as you seem to be.  PM me darling if you like.  You know what a worrier I am.
   
  Love and big hugs
   
  pusscat

• sweet_rose said on Jul 04, 2008....

  well said pusscat

• Discipline54 said on Jul 17, 2008....

  Subpet..
   
  Would you like the opinion of a Dom?  If you do, please let me know.  Another perspective may be helpful, without being judgmental or critical.
   
  Then again, I don't want to intrude.
  D.

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