Me too! I am an Idiot with Poor Taste in Men. Here Here!
I'm sorry, i relate and understand totally. I have a problem with co-dependence.
I hope the best for you. My prayer are with you. Take care of yourself.
Please don't be too hard on yourself. We are all just humans doing the best we can with what we got.
~see ya
Reserving comment until I read more and more closely, but I am so sorry to hear that things are not going well. Been there, done that...but each and every situation is different. So no advice here.....just a hug and a worried look for a nice lady for now..
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs from wombat}}}}}}}}}}}}}
woman - we don't have children together, which is in the end a blessing.
wombie - thanks for the hug. (and the worried look)
Ohh honey, its been a confusing few months for you hasn't it? I'm sorry to hear he's being such a cunt! (no apologies for that word) I should go grab my cricket bat and beat the lving shit out of him for treating you that way... you do deserve far more and I've told you that already.
Is there anyway for you to depart with your self respect in tact and not hurt your kids too much? cause I don't see this relationship as being good for you at all.... period. I'm sorry for being so blunt but you are such a lovely women worth so much more love and respect than what you are receiving.
You are the only person to think of right now you cannot help your kids of you my dear are not able to keep yourself well. There never are easy solutions in this kind of problem, please try to make sure to surround yourself with people who do love you, respect you, care for you and are willing tohelp you.. don't ever be afraid to ask for help.
God this sucks, if I was living there I'd say come on over here as long as you need!
{{{{{{{{{{{uni}}}}}}}}}}}}
All above me have already given you good advice. You deserve to be happy. I wish you strength, uni, to do what you need to do. You're in my thoughts.
u-i...this really sucks. I can only say that I am glad that this is happening now rather than later. IVF requires alot of emotional support from your spouse and I just don't see that he is capable of that.
You, my friend, are a loving and caring woman. It angers me that he was willing to put you through all of fertility testing yet, when the money just didn't come through he turned on you. I hope that you find something that is suitable for you so, that you can remove yourself from the situation.
{{{{HUGS}}}}
Sometimes a leopard will change it's spots, despite the old adage.... when they wake up in the jungle alone.
Other times, you have to find a new leopard......
I have no idea which is going to happen for you, but I trust that you will do what is best for you and all who are concerned. Emphasis on "all who are concerned."
Those who "don't need help" (or think they don't) do not get it.
Those who do, will find it.
My heartfelt wish that you will find help, solutions and peace of mind.
U-I - Good for you for finally letting this out. I hope it will give you some perspective. You are definitely not an idiot. I am someone who was also once hopeful that my spouse would keep his promises. It's his choice whether or not to change, and his loss if he doesn't.
I wish you all the best - trust your strength and don't question past decisions. It's best to use your energy to move forward. Later, you can examine this and take away certain lessons once you are in a better place.
Hugs - Wish
Hi, Unique!
If you read what you wrote, you might find that you've got the answer. Someone told me this once, and I'm passing it on to you. Nobody can live your life better than you can. Nobody can possibly know what you're feeling better than you can, and nobody can love you better than you can. My heart goes out to you, Dear. You deserve better, way better. It's time you believed it.
Blast
wombat - I think you're right about this leopard not waking. I've nearly kicked the shit out of it and it continues to snooze away. Time for a new leopard, or maybe a tiger this time.
CW - As much as I appreciate the words, just the fact that people give a shit about me at all is the best help. Thanks for being my friend.
JBox - yes, many of the behaviors are unhealthy and I've let them go on too long. At this point it's a little scary getting my "right" back, since I've been operating without them for so long.
Zayda - thanks
TIO - thanks for the hug. I like them :)
Eilan - I'm serious about being your honorary sister. Of course then you'll have to put up with me.
gingersoul - since there are no legal obligations (our handfasting wasn't a legal marriage) the only obligation I have is to put in a 30 day rental notice and pay my portion of all remaining joint bills.
WYWH - It's the actual moving forward that I find frightening, but yes, I do need to move forward.
SR - I'm sure I've contributed to the demise of this relationship. I'm not perfect. I won't go into detail, but he has stepped over the line from simple human error to sadistic behavior. The fact that I allowed this in the past is something I regret, but the fact that he cannot even acknowledge that it was over the line puts him beyond help.
RC - I tried a seperation last year and I thought after talking things through that we had finally found a middle ground. Now I see that neither of us is happy, but apparently I'm the one who needs to call it quits.
Blast - And there in lies the truth. I have to be the person to take care of myself, love myself and live my life. Thanks.