On Friday, Master asked me to be His sub again. i said yes. He solicited my candid opinions on how to make it work in light of O/our current situation, which limits O/our ability to communicate and see each other. i explained that i understood that He had limited opportunities to email and that even though i longed to see Him, touch Him, hear Him, i knew that it was hard to do at the moment, and that i could handle it. If that changed, and i couldn't take it anymore and needed to go elsewhere, i would tell Him. He responded that my understanding of His current limitations freed Him from worrying about losing me, from feeling pressured, and so freed, He could again dominate me, control me, direct me: things that He knew i needed at my core to be complete. Together, W/we could again give each other what W/we both need: that beautiful yin and yang of D/s, M/s.
And oh my was it wonderful to see Him confidant and enjoying His dominant nature once again. It made my heart soar to see Him as Himself again. Likewise, it made my soul content to once again obey, serve and please. Playing at my own whim is fun, but playing at Master's direction, enduring pain and receiving pleasure for Him is mindblowingly fulfilling.
It isn't like starting over again from scratch, but it isn't like jumping right back to where W/we were either. It is both old and new at the same time. Master described it as a rebirth, and that is apt, i think. W/we both agreed that He will re-claim me; after all, bonds were broken and they need to be re-established, along with trust. i look forward to that journey as i know that W/we will ultimately build something even better and stronger than what W/we had before this trial.
