PAPERBACKWRITER's tags:
I am tired.

I am tired of feeling nothing, and feeling so much.

I am tired of feeling detached, and excruciatingly emphathizing.

I am tired of disappointing everyone and myself.

I am tired of talking, writing, thinking of this

%&§$!=!)!?`§/$/%)!§"$"$§%/(&&/&"§&")$"?$/?//!$=)("§=?("=%´"§"!%§´!"§%"?!"§%%´!

I am tired of hoping.

I want to fast forward to the day that I can say, I survived.

Fasssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssst

FORWARD.





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Comments

  • Listener said on Jun 05, 2008....
    i understand. i hope you do get there to that day.
  • quietone said on Jun 05, 2008....
    As tired as you are my dearest paper... if you fast fwd, you miss out on some very good things in life.. like your children and their growing, and of course the love of your life and looking fwd to the trips to Holland.. ya know?  Keep thinking good thoughts - I hope you get there some day too, because you are a survivor.  {{{{Hugs}}}
  • skald said on Jun 05, 2008....
    Don't ever loose hope my dear. I can second what Quiet says. ((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))
  • PAPERBACKWRITER said on Jun 05, 2008....

    Thank you Listener.

    Thank you dearest quiet ((((hugs)))))

    Thank you dearest  skald ((((((hugs)))))))))))

    :_ )
  • secretlife said on Jun 05, 2008....
    {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
    you've survived already!
    you just haven't realized it yet.
  • Mamie said on Jun 05, 2008....
    always here if you need a hand...holding yours. best, mamie
  • crybabylu said on Jun 06, 2008....
    Photobucket
  • PAPERBACKWRITER said on Jun 06, 2008....


    thank you secret ((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))

    thank you  Mamie (((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))

    thank you dee (((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))



  • Sula said on Jun 06, 2008....

    Kumusta, paper~!

    Sinulat ko ito dati para sa sarili ko, gusto kong ibahagi ito sa iyo:

     

    Papel

     

    Payak lang

    ang pangarap na aking dinukot

    sa lukbutan ng hiraya:

     

    Isang papel

    na talasaysayan ng mga

    nakatiklop na pag-asa—

     

    Isang pahinang

    tigisan ng hilagyo at pagliyag

    sa aklat ng panahong lagalag.

     

            Mapilas man

            at maipamparikit,

            may resureksiyon ang tinig.

     

    Ito ang dingal

    sa talinghaga ng abo.

     

    ~Sula

    PS> Sana hindi ka napagod sa pagbasa. =) Peace to you and God bless.

  • crybabylu said on Jun 06, 2008....
    hope you are doing better today.   love, dee
  • newbeginnings said on Jul 15, 2008....
    One day I looked in the mirror and was so suprised that the person who looked back at me........................wasnt me. 2 years later I smiled in the mirror at the person who was in there and realised it WAS me, a diffeernt me, but me all the same. Hang in there  paperbackwriter, you will get there.

    SALUTATION TO THE DAWN

    Look to this day!
    For it is life, the very life of life.
    In its brief course
    Lie all the verities and realities of your
    existence
    The bliss of growth
    The glory of action
    The splendour of beauty,
    For yesterday is but a dream
    And tomorrow is only a vision.
    But today well lived makes every yesterday
    a dream
    of happiness
    And every tomorrow a vision of hope.
    Look well, therefore to this day!
    such is the salutation to the d
    awn.

    This poem kept me alive for 2 years xxxxxx Knowing that one day I would feel this. I sometimes still need it , but now I just enjoy it.

  • PAPERBACKWRITER said on Jul 16, 2008....

    Thank you so much for your support, and taking time to reach out :_ )

    Sula ~

    salamat sa tula!

    dee ~

    I´m constantly forging on...the girls motivate me a lot to do so...

    newbeginnings ~

    welcome to my blog, and you really touched my heart for leaving words of encouragement. my deepest gratitude; i am familiar with this poem but did not know the title, i read it again and again, until tears of relief came pouring out me.


    again, thank you so much <3333333333333333333333

    paper ~


  • newbeginnings said on Jul 16, 2008....
    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx hearing you dcried made me read it again and then I cried.
    xxxx remember the sky will be blue!
     
  • newbeginnings said on Jul 17, 2008....
    Was thinking about you tis morning and just wanted to send you a :)
  • PAPERBACKWRITER said on Jul 21, 2008....

    newbeginnings ~

    (((((((((((((((((huggies))))))))))))))))))))))

    paper ~

Comment on "I´m TIRED!!!"

depression love Sula Papel pag-ibig (Click to add tags below)

(Separate tags using commas, for example: New York, dating, vegetarian)

The dulldrums.........
so today, is one of those dark days...
the curious incident with the black cat...
I am a teenager, 15 yrs, and I have for 10 years been depressed. For the last for 4-6 years I've been wanting to die. For at least 2 years I've been dreaming about my death and for the last 5 months I've been catching myself make plans...
I know I need to answer some comments on my last post, but I just don't have the wherewithal to do it right now....

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