• secretlife said on May 22, 2008....

  my husband's company used to have these very fancy christmas parties and i used to love them because they gave me an excuse to go out and buy a fancy dress. 
   
  one year i got this black velvet and lace number-  it was maybe 2001 0r 2002-
  the entire top was this beautiful black lace- with just velvet cups.  the back was all lace-  so a bra presented a problem....
   
  i'm hardly flat chested, so i thought i had to find something-
   
  i found these glue on cups at Lord & Taylors-
   
  the night of the affair i glued them on, but they wouldn't stay in place.
  what a disaster!
  everytime i tried to pull the dress up, a cup would move.  and there was no room for movement or error of any kind in it. 
   
  time was running short, so finally, with my husband calling from downstairs that we were late, i had no choice but to pull off the cups and just forget about that idea.
   
  i was surprised that i liked the dress so much better with nothing underneath....
   
  when i got home that night, and went to change, my breasts were covered in black fuzz.  obviously there was still glue on me, and the insides of the dress stuck!
   
  my husband chose that night to take a few "risque" pictures of me ...which i promptly disposed of because all i could see were my black fuzzy boobs!

• Lucytorial said on May 22, 2008....

  mwaahahahahhaa
  
                                     MWAA HA HAHAHAAA
  
  OMG, imagine it, like breast slippers! all fluff and no substance... still could have been sexy!
  
  How did you get the damn glue off?
  

• hotaka said on May 22, 2008....

  Oh, my. Well, I suppose your reaction and comment really topped it off. That was the funniest part. As for your husband... I understand why he got the bruise. My wife would have crucified me had I let that happen to her.
  
  I know I have had plenty of embarrassing moments in my life but always small. After reading your story I have nothing that comes even near that.
  
  Just now laughing at secret's Puma boobs. Meow! Here kitty, kitty!
  

• Lucytorial said on May 22, 2008....

  Hotaka, you can't get out of it that easy!
  
  Cough up buddy, no matter how small someone has to be able to laugh AT YOU!
  

• secretlife said on May 22, 2008....

  rubbing alcohol.....
   
  never again....

• MissMimi said on May 22, 2008....

  Back when I was a teenager, I still wore a leg brace so I could stand.  I was a proud member of the high school choir, and we were to sing in the halftime show of a H.S. football game.  It had been raining all day, so the field was good and muddy.  I stood up from the wheelchair to put on my choir robe. (Now, why we wore choir robes out in the rain on a football field I will never know.)  When I went to sit back down, the chair slipped in the mud, and down I went, flat on my ass in a mud puddle.  Embarrassed, muddy-assed, and convulsed in laughter.  Well, what're ya gonna do?  Cry about it?  It was hilarious.

• bluegum said on May 23, 2008....

  i reckon this one would have made any bloke gawk ,reported in the HERALD SUN today about a jewish shelia in NEW ZEALAND got tired of the road workers wolf whistling at her when useing a t m she is supposed to have said to them ''how do you like this'' and stripped down to her birthday suit in front of them ,reporter said police took her to the police station and cautioned her, reporter said policeman said she was good looking woman,bet that taught those road workers a lesson ,no more wolf whistleing from them.
  blue.

• silverwhisper said on May 23, 2008....

  tobi-lee, please tell me that in the future, you'll see how an outfit looks in a mirror before going out? and feel free to trout-smack mr. torial!
  
  ed

• hotaka said on May 23, 2008....

  I'll have to think about. I have been laughed at many times but usually cruelly and when I was a child.
  
  Oh, I have one! I was working in a pet food and supply warehouse and everyday I closed the bay doors at 4:30 even when I had overtime work to do. But basically I went home at 4:30 most days. Some days I had plans and wanted to leave right away. On one such day a particular customer, whom I found exceedingly annoying because she would always show up at 4:40 and take her time choosing what she wanted to buy, called and said she wanted to buy some damaged cat little bags (she ran a shelter for stray cats). The receptionist told me that the customer promised to arrive before 4:30. But as always she came late and I was just starting to pull down the doors to. Already I was late for my plans and now she wanted to come in and ask lots of questions and take her time. I had prepared some bags for her but she wandered around the warehouse asking about this and that. I was following her and trying to answer each question curtly enough so that she would take a hint (bad customer relations I know but her account with us was a charity one - we let her buy from us to help her organization help the cats).
  
  At last she made up her mind and I was now 20 minutes late leaving. The receptionist came back to the warehouse and I told her what the woman was going to buy and what discount she could get. Then I went to the front office via the staff room. I expected the receptionist would take the woman to the front office via the customer entrance and so as I walked into the staff room I punch my fist in my hand and growled, "That bitch!" I heard a gasp behind me and turned around to see the customer and receptionist had followed me into the staff room. Quickly I tried to save the situation by punching my fist into my hand again and said, "That cat litter has been such a pest because it is so dusty and it leeks all the time. I'm glad (punching my hand again) to finally be rid of it." I think the woman bought it but I gave the receptionist a mean look.
  

• queenparanoia said on May 23, 2008....

  ohmygod!!!!

  well when i was in high scool my left slipper broke! i went home barefoot. and people keep looking at me.

• uniquely-ironic said on May 23, 2008....

  Years ago when I worked at the ER the staff would have a big blow out Christmas Party every year.  The gals would wear very expensive sexy dresses since the only thing we ever saw them wear during the year was scrubs.
   
  So I bought this very pretty burgundy dress that was all clingy and low cut in the back.  I felt very sexy in it and danced the night away.  My ex surprised me by booking a room at a B&B that night, so I ended up sleep au natural. 
   
  The next morning I got up and put the sexy dress on for our trip home.  As I walked to the bathroom to freshen up there was a distinctly cold draft on my backside that I didn't remember having when I had arrived at the party the night before.  I looked in the mirror and there my bare ass was, taking in the fresh air!!!
   
  I asked my ex if he had noticed this little problem and he had ........ last night ........... some time in the evening after I'd busted the seam out dancing off all the alcohol I'd consumed.  Asshole hadn't even bothered to mention it, but then neither did any of my coworkers.
   
  I endured ass jokes for about 6 months at work after that.

• diabolicdame said on May 23, 2008....

  Hahahahaha.. that is so funny ya'all! I gotta say something like that has never happened to me.. but I will be that extra bit careful from now on! lol..

• skald said on May 23, 2008....

  Well good for you Lucy. lol 

• GrapeKoolaid said on May 23, 2008....

  What...  Telling the guy at the drive thru that I love him doesn't count?  :D

• cuppajava said on May 23, 2008....

  Hi Luce.How you been? I've probably got quite a few stories to tell,but most are for my younger days - I'll scratch my head and see if I can come up with the best one.

  Hi Secret,I've taken a few risque pictures in my life,but fuzzy boobs has got to be a bit of a starnge one.I hope you managed to get the glue off and you survived !!!

• quietone said on May 23, 2008....

  LOL these are all pretty funny!  I would have been a bit pee'd off to Lucy and probably smacked  him too!  and secret with her fuzzy nips! LOL

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