I've been given permission to write about an unfortunate sexcapade Bethany has had. This took place about a week ago.
She works w/this guy named Xanax. We began calling him that b/c she invited him over one night and he was acting all crazy. He called her when he was on his way, and he was all freaking out, asking her if anyone else was over there, then he just drove around her neighborhood for awhile...he kinda seemed like he was having an anxiety attack. When he got there all he wanted to talk about was dog penis. Finally they went and laid down to sleep. After a couple hours, she awoke to him touching her leg. She heard him take out his thing and start whacking off, then the sound of a condom ripping open and being applied. She was kinda freaked out but decided to roll w/it. She didn't think it was likely that he would be a good fuck, but was hoping for the best. He climbs on top of her and starts trying to fuck her, but apparently his penis was so short it didn't really reach, and he was fucking the side of her leg for awhile. Also, aside from it being so small, it was half soft. She described it as a marshmellow wrapped in rubber. He kept trying to squeeze it in the middle to make the end hard enough to penetrate, but it wasn't working. So he pretty much fucked her leg for awhile, and he may have thought he was fucking her, she's not 100% sure.
The next day she was really, really pissed off. She's like, "If you know your penis is like that, why even introduce it into the situation in the first place?? That was nonsense!"
In other news, there appears to be some type of wild cat living in my backyard. He is white w/a black face, and about 3 times the size of a house cat. Wtf is it? A bobcat?
