I am sitting at a table. The table is in my friend's house. The computer is my friend's computer, but the words belong to me.

My friend got roses yesterday. A rose bush from her husband, and a bouqet of roses from her children.

My children gave me a rose bush a few years ago. I had to leave it at the last place that felt like it was my real home. My husband used to give me pink roses. They smelled so sweet. He gave me a dozen huge pink roses the last time that I thought we would ever be separated. The whole house was filled with their glorious and intoxicating scent that kept reminding me that he loved me, and that his heart's desire was to be home with us again.

That was about 10 years ago...that particular separation, I mean. I thought it was our last separation ever. But he left me again in 2006. He told me things about himself that rocked my world...and shook me to the core. Then he went to California right after our 18th wedding anniversary, and Thanksgiving. He kissed us good-bye and promised to be back the week before Christmas. He didn't. He only came home when his California dreams turned into nightmares. It was the end of February 2007 before he came "home".

I am looking at one, just one pink rose as I type this. It smells just as sweet as the roses of my past...but it stands alone in a borrowed vase. It was given to me by my friend. She took this one from her own bouqet, to give to me. It stands surrounded with Babies Breath to remind me that for now, I must stand alone...my babies surround me...the scent of The Rose surrounds me too. The Rose of Sharon said that He will never leave nor forsake me. He never has, and He never will.

I hope you don't mind if I share another song with you. I don't know if there is a video or a recording of this song or not. It is from the same cd that my children and my friend bought for me on Mother's Day. It goes like this:

TRAMPLED ROSE

Long way going to
Get my medicine
Sky's the autumn grey of a lonely wren

Piano from a window played
Gone tomorrow, gone yesterday

I found it in the street
At first I did not see
Lying at my feet
A trampled rose

Passing the hat in church
It never stops going around

You never pay just once
To get the job done

What I done to me,
I done to you
What happened to the trampled rose?

In the muddy street
With the fireworks and the leaves

A blind man with a cup I asked
Would he play "Kisses Sweeter Than Wine"

I know that rose,
Like I know my name
The one I gave my love,
It was the same
Now I find it in the street,
A trampled rose

Written by Tom Waits and Kathleen Brennan (JALMA Music)

Thanks loves, for sharing my thoughts today...such as they are.