Myriad of thoughts brood in my mind...no matter how I wish they'd go away...they are like opiates...I can not resist them...they are garbed in seduction appealing to my most carnal desire...
And in the nights when my body asked for a much-needed break, they continue to haunt me and I mumble them even as I sleep.
These thoughts as primordial as the world, are insatiable. They choose their victims or the victims choose them.
Yes, it is my arrogance that engendered these thoughts. My arrogance that my life has a higher purpose or reason other than my 'being'. But is there really?
This question has lingered through centuries ever since man became conscious of his existence. But even up to now, no answer has satisfied me...they seem shallow if not ecclesiastical.
Am I here for a reason? Is everybody here for a reason? When I look around me, I know the glaring answer is NO. Nobody deserves to be alive and lead a life of mediocrity. But there are too many who live far less than mediocrity. Tell me if there is a noble reason for such.
Maybe I have to concede to the fact that I am here and that should be enough. I owe it to myself to live the kind of life I think I can have with my repository of talents, skills and knowledge. Lest I forget, I too have a beauty. But beauty ends when intellect begins. I know more than I should and know less than I want.
My existence is part of the universal components. What is my role in it? Maybe too little, maybe too big, or maybe just enough. But I don't know what it is yet. Maybe it will take a lifetime to discern it, experiences make us verify the truth and only then that we are enlightened. But when it does reveal itself to me, I shall stop talking for then, I have said what I had to and needed to. And that should be enough to treasure a lifetime.
antithesis posted on May 09, 2008
| views: 152
Comments
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skald said on May 24, 2008....
Sure you are here for a reason and all of us. Welcome to SoulCast. -
antithesis said on May 24, 2008....
Thanks skald :-) -
oceanwaves said on Jun 07, 2008....
antithesis iI would like to compliment you on your blogging in expressing yourself I wish I was half as good as you, but alas I am only a common man, but I enjoyed reading your post, and as I was enjoying reading your post several things came to mind: I am now as the lyric in a song goes on the back side of thirty and the short side of life, and it has been my experience we all have opportunities to be followers and leaders in our journey- I was an officer in military intelligence during the Vietnam invasion era so I had an opportunity to lead and I have also taught school children yet another opportunity to lead; however I would have to say the majority of my years were spent as a follower.As I was reading your post it brought back ideas expressed in a PBS special I saw with Bill Gates and Warren Buffet when they both said the same thing about being a follower or leader each basically said it was just the luck of the draw as to if you were a follower or leader that you were either born with a lucky hand or not and being born in America was the luckiest card in the hand. I also saw something similar on an interview title conversations with history on the UCTV network and I am sorry that I don't remember the person's name being interviewed, but what he said is more important to your topic than his name; he said some of us were intended to be leaders and some followers which we both knew. but he also stated if we wanted to be satisfied in our life's journey we should not try to be what we aren't because no matter how a follower tries to be a leader he will never be because he was given the abilities to be a leader, and a leader would never be satisfied being a follower because he would be wasting his abilities. It has been my experience that all these men are correct.The above are obviously secular views, and I could not really determine from reading your blog what your religious beliefs are, but if you are a believer in Jesus the following might help shed some light on your topic (http://www.tomorrowsworld.org/cgi-bin/tw/telecast/tw-telecast.cgi?category=Media1&item=1132819252), Why Are You ALIVE? and (http://www.tomorrowsworld.org/cgi-bin/tw/telecast/tw-telecast.cgi?category=Media1&item=1114671611), Why Were You Really Born? I am not one of those people who aretrying to save the world so don't worry, but I do think there are secular and religious answers to our questions and this is what I am offering. PEACE-DL
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