• pickersplock said on May 04, 2008....

  You have brought up probably the most imortant point in assuring that someone gets adequate treatment, which has nothing to do with the doctor!
  Everyone needs to be a good advocate for themselves, and in the abscence of being your own advocate, you need someone trustworthy who can take up your cause!
  Bravo, Fire!

• Fire-flower said on May 04, 2008....

  So true pickers. Even tho' my grandmother was in a private hospital for quite a while, the standard of nursing was appalling - so I studied her files, and got to the hospital early, and left late. During that time, I stopped them from taking her for tests meant for the woman in the next bed, twice arranged with the pharmacy to send medication which the ward sister had failed to order...I could go on and on. God help you if you are too sick to care for yourself, and have no-one in your corner. And to those who are sick themselves, or have loved ones who are, I urge you - read up on everything, second guess every medical decision, and as pickers said, be a good advocate for yourself. I don't like to be pushy generally, but when it comes to me and my own, I will do what I have to.

• lionesss said on May 04, 2008....

  my dad died or cancer,(lung cancer) then it went to his spine
  when we 1st found out he had cancer, he was treated with chemo! but it was the lack of care and sympathy that we as a family decided to look after him at home were we knew he was getting 24hr care,,thhere was a man on the same war as him he was being sic and getting quiete distressed it wasnt until the nurse saw me draw bk my dad curtain to see if he was ok thats when the nurses came over and started fusing over him,, i just wonder what if no,1 had been there it does make you wonder, when im in hospital i see nurses just leave the old folks sitting alone, a few times iv gone over to give them a blanket and they ve not even known, or their dinners have been brought and just left,it does get me soooooo mad,
  thats why i was so determind to look after my granma at home, and my dad,
  at least they passed knowing they werent on there own,,,,

• lionesss said on May 04, 2008....

  my dad died or cancer,(lung cancer) then it went to his spine
  when we 1st found out he had cancer, he was treated with chemo! but it was the lack of care and sympathy that we as a family decided to look after him at home were we knew he was getting 24hr care,,thhere was a man on the same war as him he was being sic and getting quiete distressed it wasnt until the nurse saw me draw bk my dad curtain to see if he was ok thats when the nurses came over and started fusing over him,, i just wonder what if no,1 had been there it does make you wonder, when im in hospital i see nurses just leave the old folks sitting alone, a few times iv gone over to give them a blanket and they ve not even known, or their dinners have been brought and just left,it does get me soooooo mad,
  thats why i was so determind to look after my granma at home, and my dad,
  at least they passed knowing they werent on there own,,,,

• soulsurviver said on May 04, 2008....

  Advocate I am

• Angelangel said on May 05, 2008....

  i am always amazed how dumb some oncologists actually are.

• Twylarants said on May 05, 2008....

  Fire~ When my grandmother died (about 20 years ago), we were shocked at the indifference expressed by the doctor and the nurses. She was 83, but not "old", if you know what I mean. Her doctor didn't know exactly what was wrong with her, so he  chalked it up to old age. It was a bleeding ulcer, but no one knew that until she died. The nurses in the hospital told us she was "acting like a spoiled child" because she wouldn't eat. She was screaming from the pain, and they were annoyed with her.
  We tried to tell the doctor that this was totally out of character for her, but he wasn't interested.
  

• wishyouwerehere said on May 05, 2008....

  While I agree that it is important for everyone to act as their own advocate, or have a trusted family member or friend available who can act in their stead, it is a doctor's responsibility to consider all available options regardless of the patient's age. 
   
  The best measure of a person's health is their prior level of function.  My Nana is 95 and she doesn't even use a cane. 
   
  I am appalled that the oncologist is not better at providing palliative or comfort care.  It is such a key part of the services required in that line of specialty.
   
  Fire, your Nana is so lucky to have you.  I can only imagine how difficult and frustrating this must be!

• silverwhisper said on May 06, 2008....

  i'm shocked that the oncologist didn't recognize a simple case of dehydration. however, i'm also shocked that the nursing staff failed to notice it, too!
  
  ed

• Fire-flower said on May 06, 2008....

  Lioness - that's me. When my mother died (my grandmother used to stay with her) I actually had people recommending I put my grandmother in an old-age home. No way....Bless you for looking after your dad and granma.
  Soul - good for you. Thanks for stopping by
  Angel - I heartily agree with you - but I would extend the remark to all kinds of doctors
  Twyla - I have to say, the dismissive way in which the aged are treated is enough to make me want to smack someone. Before my grandmother was diagnosed, all the doctors I took her to blamed old-age, and wait for it - 'depression'. Never mind that she's always been very spry, and never been depressed a day in her life.
  Wishy - always nice to hear from you. That's the thing exactly - my grandmother was also functioning at a very high level - no cane, gardening, running around - something which was flat out ignored when she became ill.
  Ed - nothing surprises me any more, I'm sad to say. One area the doctors and hospitals show unbelievable efficiency in  - you guessed it - sending out accounts and getting paid. Now if only they could extend that same enthusiasm to the treatment of their patients!
  

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