The couple that lives in the building across the street from me is fighting again. Their windows face mine and I can hear them yelling at each right now.
Last time this happened was at 12 in the night a couple of months ago. Their lights were switched off but their windows were open and their was a night lamp on in their house so I could see them. I was alone at home and studying for an exam when I started hearing loud voices. I looked out and I saw the two of them standing in the drawing room and their little kid standing in their hallway. The man was yelling at her really bad and then he started hitting here. She ran from the drawing room to the bed room and he ran behind her and kept hitting her. Their kid was watching the whole thing. They put out the night lamp and I couldn't see them anymore but I could still hear them. I could hear the woman crying out loudly and what sounded like the man grabbing at her throat and hitting her so that her voice would cut off. This went on for a few minuted and then could hear the woman crying and yelling for another couple of hours.
This really really terrorized me. And now I can hear her voice again. Although it doesn't sound like he his hitting her, I'm shaking here! I'd never in my life a man hitting a woman before that night I saw them. I was completely horrified and alone and had an exam the next morning. I didn't know what to do! I thought maybe to call the police but I was really in no position to do that. I live here with a roommate.. my parents live in another city.. and that night like today, I was alone.. and I'm a student and a girl and I don't trust the cops here. Anyway I can't afford to get involved into this. I have to worry about my own safety. But we live in apartment buildings here. There must be at least 50 families that heard them and a couple of door men. Nobody interfered. And just the next day I saw them sitting together in their drawing room and watching tv, her head on his shoulder. It didn't look like she would have been happy if I would have interfered. Why do women let men do this to them? Why didn't she walk out? And what kind of a man would do this in front of his kid??
Its just scary to hear their voices and see that somebody lives this life.
diabolicdame posted on Apr 26, 2008
| views: 329
Comments
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lfbno7 said on Apr 26, 2008....
I think they need Cesar Millan the Dog Whisperer to calm their little pack down. Either he is a psycho or there is an unhealthy energy between the two of them that she feeds. In other words, either "it takes two to tango" or it's all him. Do you get any feeling about that? Obviously he's a mess, but do you get the feeling that she's bringing it out of him in some way? Either by messing with him or by being terrified of him. I wonder what happens just before he starts going bonkers. Is he drunk or on drugs? -
skald said on Apr 26, 2008....
Can you not make a anon call? Does the police not head to that? -
quietone said on Apr 26, 2008....
diabolic ~ I don't know why women put up with this kind of abuse... mostly because they think they can do no better and are scared to death to be alone. Please, do call the next time.. and there will be a next time. for the sake of the child if nothing else... the poor thing.. that is not NOT right. And what, God forbid, something were to happen to that girl.. wouldn't you feel really really bad? I do think you could make an anon call and leave it at that. I sure would not want to see or hear that either, It would scare me too. You stay safe ~ {{{hugs}}} -
secretlife said on Apr 26, 2008....
police.you should call them.don't worry about what their problems are or why he hits her or why she stays or how horrible it is that they do thisin front of their children. just pick up the phone and call the police- -
diabolicdame said on Apr 26, 2008....
lfbno: I don't know man.. it just looks from here like he;s the boss, you know? She's a housewife and and he calls the shots.. I have no clue if he drinks or anything. but I haven't seen anything such. I mean I can pretty much see into their house and I haven't seen a glass in his hand.
skald: Yes I probably can make an anon call.. I think I'll do that next time this happens.. there is a kid in the house.. somebody needs to call the police. Thanks.
quietone: Yes I'm quite concerned about the woman and the kid too. I will make the call next time. I definitely will.
SL: Yes. I will do that next time I see this. I'll just call the police. Thanks.
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mobil said on Apr 26, 2008....
I remember back in the 1960's, a girl was choked and stabbed to death in NYC. Hundreds of people saw this happening, no one helped her, no one called the police.You gotta get involved Dame, if no one interferes, next time it could be you needing help. -
diabolicdame said on Apr 26, 2008....
mobil: Thats really eye opening now. isn't it! I'll call the cops next time. No question about it. Thanks mobil. -
lfbno7 said on Apr 26, 2008....
Kitty Genovese. And then Phil Ochs wrote a song about it called Outside Of A Small Circle Of Friends.
Outside Of A Small Circle Of Friends By Phil Ochs
Look outside the window, there's a woman being grabbed They've dragged her to the bushes and now she's being stabbed Maybe we should call the cops and try to stop the pain But Monopoly is so much fun, I'd hate to blow the game And I'm sure it wouldn't interest anybody Outside of a small circle of friends.
Riding down the highway, yes, my back is getting stiff Thirteen cars are piled up, they're hanging on a cliff. Maybe we should pull them back with our towing chain But we gotta move and we might get sued and it looks like it's gonna rain And I'm sure it wouldn't interest anybody Outside of a small circle of friends.
Sweating in the ghetto with the colored and the poor The rats have joined the babies who are sleeping on the floor Now wouldn't it be a riot if they really blew their tops? But they got too much already and besides we got the cops And I'm sure it wouldn't interest anybody Outside of a small circle of friends.
Oh there's a dirty paper using sex to make a sale The Supreme Court was so upset, they sent him off to jail. Maybe we should help the fiend and take away his fine. But we're busy reading Playboy and the Sunday New York Times And I'm sure it wouldn't interest anybody Outside of a small circle of friends
Smoking marihuana is more fun than drinking beer, But a friend of ours was captured and they gave him thirty years Maybe we should raise our voices, ask somebody why But demonstrations are a drag, besides we're much too high And I'm sure it wouldn't interest anybody Outside of a small circle of friends
Oh look outside the window, there's a woman being grabbed They've dragged her to the bushes and now she's being stabbed Maybe we should call the cops and try to stop the pain But Monopoly is so much fun, I'd hate to blow the game And I'm sure it wouldn't interest anybody Outside of a small circle of friends
[ Additional verse, 1974]
Down in Santiago where they took away our mines We cut off all their money so they robbed the storehouse blind Now maybe we should ask some questions, maybe shed a tear But I bet you a copper penny, it cannot happen here And I'm sure it wouldn't interest anybody Outside of a small circle of friends
I know it is scary and troubling to call the cops, but use your judgment and if it appears to be a crime going on, you might be helping the situation to have a cop knock on their door and let the guy know he can't just get away with being wicked. -
diabolicdame said on Apr 26, 2008....
lfbno thats intense. I'm so calling the cops next time!! -
lfbno7 said on Apr 26, 2008....
I like Phil Ochs. He was a great folk singer. Then he killed himself. I wish I could find his version of Pleasures of the Harbor on You Tube, one of the most beautiful songs I ever heard. But all I found was somebody else's version of that Phil Ochs song, and it can't compare. -
diabolicdame said on Apr 26, 2008....
Yes he really does sound incredibly talented! -
Eilan said on Apr 26, 2008....
My dad beat my mom for years and within sight and hearing of neighbors and no one ever called the cops. -
skald said on Apr 26, 2008....
Dia, I am glad to hear that and I do undestand that you are worried and frighted. -
Fallyn said on Apr 26, 2008....
sounds like me......our neighbors called the police two or three times.....it didn't really do any good. i didn't leave him until i made the decision to on my terms.
it's something i've thought about and thought about. what could anyone have done to make me see what my life had become? there really wasn't much anyone could have done to be honest. i just had to finally realize he wasn't going to be any different. and realize that i was worth more than that.
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diabolicdame said on Apr 27, 2008....
Eilan: I'm sorry to hear that. I won't be making the same mistake as your neighbors anymore.
skald: Thanks for understanding. :-)
Fallyn: Wow.. that sounds like a tough time! I do agree that we can only make changes in our life when we realize that changes need to be made. Nobody can convince us of it. I have been blind when it comes to my own life as well. Though I'm hoping that me calling the cops next time will be a deterrent for him next time.
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crybabylu said on Apr 27, 2008....
That sounds very scary, I don't know how I would handle that. -
lfbno7 said on Apr 27, 2008....
It shouldn't be scary to call the cops. Just tell the person on the phone what you see and hear, and you're done. No big deal. No repercussions for you. You just feel like a good samaritan, and hopefully you let the bully know that the victim has the cops on her side, and cops are more dangerous than he is, because he can get arrested and do time. -
diabolicdame said on Apr 27, 2008....
crybabylu: Yes that is how I felt initially too.
lfbno: Hmmmn.. thanks.. I guess I needed to hear that.. it really is no big deal, is it? Thanks again. I will do it next time.
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lfbno7 said on Apr 27, 2008....
Some bananahead in my neighborhood called the cops on my wife's car, saying it was blocking their driveway, which it wasn't. It's easy to call the cops. They got nothing much to do. They just sit around the station eating Chinese food. -
hotaka said on May 01, 2008....
I think calling the police would have been a good idea. I would have done it. But then again, maybe she thinks she is actually happy there and would resent having her issues brought to the attention of outsiders.
As for why women stay with men like that? I have a long story and I just gave up trying to understand it. Basically, I think it's a childhood thing. I am watching a weekly drama now that deals with exactly that issue. All I can say is more power to the women who can find the strength to escape.
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diabolicdame said on May 02, 2008....
ifbno: Haha.. that kinda puts things in perspective.. thanks.. I don't know why I was so intimidated by calling the cops!
hotaka: I thought of calling the cops.. bu I was just too scared by the whole thing.. and quite shocked.. and yes I also felt unsure because I thought what if she doesn't want this or gets beaten up more tomo because I called the cops..
Anyway I think I just felt intimidated and shocked. Next time though I will call the cops. And I agree.. more power to the ones that find enough strength to escape!!
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