I am now just back from the hospital!
Why??? What??? How???
I thought I had an errant eyelash in my that was being a complete bastard. I tried rinsing, I tried the shower, I tried shoving my finger in my eye and for three hours this morning I was in total frustration and pain.
I was very close to getting fucking teaspoon and scooping my whole eye out!
So off to the hospital, where by they looked, poked (not really) prodded and then put a local in my eye, then looked at it through a scope, then put yellow die in my eye, then found the offending foreign matter, got that out, then checked for scratches on my eye of which the doctors response was.
"holey cow, your whole eye is scratched, from twelve to three o clock, from 6 to 10 its really bad"
Great I'm thinking I've totally fucked my eye up!
So I have a patch on, yeh go ahead and laugh, not funny I may have damaged my cornea, my iris is fucked but will heal but I have to use antibiotic eye drops for three days along with a pirate patch and then hope for the best on Monday!
Fucking hell why is it this silly shit always happens to me??? I swear I am a walking example of life's Irony and why? I hear you ask???
We have a business dinner tonight with a new client and guess what the fuck the business is?????
REMOTE AREA EYE FLIGHT CARE!!!!!!!!!!!!! (called eye flight) The guys an eye doctor, he flies to remote areas to fix peoples eyes! man he's going to think I'm giving him shit! or its a bad joke!!!!
My husband had the audacity to say "We just need to find you a parrot now!" He won't quit with the smart remarks like arde arrr arrr, or "take a look at this! oh you can't"
By the way its really hard to type and do shit in general with one eye, I am spatially challenged...
Lucytorial posted on Mar 21, 2008
| views: 470
Comments
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diabolicdame said on Mar 21, 2008....
Oh Lucy.. I'm sorry.. You poor thing.. I'm sure you'll get better soon. What's a scratch or two.. or tewnty? You know I can sense how frustrated you are but I have to tell you its still kinda funny.. Arrr Captain! He he.. Sorry, couldn't resist.. Anyway give your eyes some rest and try to look at the bright side of it (no pun intended).. Atleast you've still got one good eye! ;-) Sh*t.. m sorry.. I did it again.. Oh just get well soon! -
pickersplock said on Mar 21, 2008....
I had that happen once, but I was able to go to the eye doctor. He just flipped my eyelid back and scooped it out. I remember how much it hurt though! Owie! -
Lucytorial said on Mar 21, 2008....
They did that flip thing to me and that didn't hurt now that the aniseptic is wearing off its starting to really hurt!
Man so can you imagine me tonight at dinner, not only an eye patch on but sun burn and glasses on, I swear I'm a dick head.
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pickersplock said on Mar 21, 2008....
Imagine if you had to walk around with your eye lid flipped up! -
Mr_Box said on Mar 21, 2008....
That sucks. I'm sorry about your eye. I had to wear an eyepatch once too. I tripped over some crap in my room and I slammed my face into the corner of a chair. Right on my eye.The whole thing filled up with blood and I couldn't see. It was scary. It got better eventually but I had to wear a pirate patch for 2 weeks.I was 16 too, so the mocking at school was quite intense. I hope your eye gets better soon and you don't get teased too bad. -
Lucytorial said on Mar 21, 2008....
2 weeks would have sucked! i know i will ribbed the whole night tonight, its just embarrassing i'm always in the wars with silly stuff like this -
bluegum said on Mar 21, 2008....
lucy you are to look after your eye dont you frigg around with an eye injury ,and when the local wears off it will hurt i've had a feww from welding,grinding and wood chips there all damaging to our eyes.though it has't stopped me from looking at a set of bumpers.he he. -
Lucytorial said on Mar 21, 2008....
Thanks bluey! unless you've hurt your eye you just don't realise how damn important they are! so far this afternoon I've banged into furniture, missed my mouth with my coffee and dam if I don't want to rub the bastard of a thing real good.
Welding??? Man you are a true aussie bloke hey! grinding... (should have been the other kind the kind that doesn't hurt! pffttt he he hehehehhee
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gingersoul said on Mar 21, 2008....
Lucy.....oh, come on...a pirate look is always sexy....lol....
Hope you get well soon. But your hubby IS funny....:-D
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Lucytorial said on Mar 21, 2008....
Thanks Ginger, he said he's going to fashion a few eye patches for different outfits for me... then laughed... he is funny but still it stings my ego! I may try drawing something on it if its going to stick out then I should really make it stick out I think... I might ask my friend who is dining with us tonight to take a pic! -
Mamie said on Mar 21, 2008....
do you know how funny you are? I am sorry about your eye...i hope it feel better soon! M -
rupert7 said on Mar 21, 2008....
HERE IS A SONG TO GO WITH THE PATCH CAPTAIN LUCY!! - Hope the eye heals OK! ((((hug))))
Yo Ho Ho (and a Bottle of Rum)
Fifteen men on a dead man's chest
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum.Drink and the devil had done for the rest
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum.The mate was fixed by the bosun's pike
The bosun brained with a marlinspike
And cookey's throat was marked belike
It had been gripped by fingers ten;
And there they lay, all good dead men
Like break o'day in a boozing ken
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum.Fifteen men of the whole ship's list
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!Dead and be damned and the rest gone whist!
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!The skipper lay with his nob in gore
Where the scullion's axe his cheek had shore
And the scullion he was stabbed times four
And there they lay, and the soggy skies
Dripped down in up-staring eyes
In murk sunset and foul sunrise
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum.Fifteen men of 'em stiff and stark
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!Ten of the crew had the murder mark!
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!'Twas a cutlass swipe or an ounce of lead
Or a yawing hole in a battered head
And the scuppers' glut with a rotting red
And there they lay, aye, damn my eyes
Looking up at paradise
All souls bound just contrawise
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum.Fifteen men of 'em good and true
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!Ev'ry man jack could ha' sailed with Old Pew,
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
There was chest on chest of Spanish gold
With a ton of plate in the middle hold
And the cabins riot of stuff untold,
And they lay there that took the plum
With sightless glare and their lips struck dumb
While we shared all by the rule of thumb,
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!More was seen through a sternlight screen...
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum.Chartings undoubt where a woman had been
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum.'Twas a flimsy shift on a bunker cot
With a dirk slit sheer through the bosom spot
And the lace stiff dry in a purplish blot
Oh was she wench or some shudderin' maid
That dared the knife and took the blade
By God! she had stuff for a plucky jade
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum.Fifteen men on a dead man's chest
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum.Drink and the devil had done for the rest
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum.We wrapped 'em all in a mains'l tight
With twice ten turns of a hawser's bight
And we heaved 'em over and out of sight,
With a Yo-Heave-Ho! and a fare-you-well
And a sudden plunge in the sullen swell
Ten fathoms deep on the road to hell,
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
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Lucytorial said on Mar 21, 2008....
Rupert..... thanks heaps, you should join my husband tonight in ribbing me... here is a photo for your efforts!
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Mamie said on Mar 21, 2008....
thats funny, you swore you were a dick head...I don't agree! -
Lucytorial said on Mar 21, 2008....
No maybe a one patch wonder of the world!, maybe I attract odd things like a magnet and a needle... -
MissMimi said on Mar 21, 2008....
Yeah, gotta agree with Mamie. I've known a few dickheads in my day, and you don't look like one to me.Lucy, I'm sorry you hurt your eye, really, but damn, girl, you made me laugh.(BTW, Lucy, you are very pretty. :) ) -
Lucytorial said on Mar 21, 2008....
MissM, thank you, if I can look a little okay with a patch on well... cool. My husband just spoke with our friend who is joining us in that business dinner tonight... so what did he do??
He shared the joy, hardee harrr harr.... he won't stop laughing about it....
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soleme said on Mar 21, 2008....
Ooooooooooh!, Sorry about the eye! I agree with Miss Mimi, you are very pretty, so just curly your hair for the dinner date and let a few strangs hang in front of the patch and off you go.Get well soon! -
I'mNotHungry said on Mar 21, 2008....
Oh my goodness! You poor thing! I'm so sorry about your eye....
Thanks for the pic - it's nice to put a comment/blog with a face :-)
Take care!P.S. I don't think it looks like a pirate patch, at all. No ma'am. Maybe you can get some sequins or sparkly paint to "dress it up" for the weekend... that would be fun. (Can you tell I have a 6 year old - watch out - she'll bedazzle the hell out of it!!!)
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Lucytorial said on Mar 21, 2008....
INH tee he hee thanks and yeh I was actually thinking of doing what Soleme said and also paint it a colour or something... try and find a SMALLER amount of tape so half my face isn't covered in it. -
CreativeWoman said on Mar 21, 2008....
Ouch! I hope your eye is better soon. Maybe this will cinch the deal with the new client. Stranger things have happened. :-)
CW
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diabolicdame said on Mar 22, 2008....
Hey i just saw the picture and you look really nice even with the patch! Its not cramping your style one bit so don't worry bout it! It doesn't look like a pirate patch at all either. Just enjoy yourself and get better soon! :-) -
PAPERBACKWRITER said on Mar 22, 2008....
you are so purrrrrrrdddddddddy my friend reaaaaaaaaallly . . .(so sorry though that it had to take something really awa - as Germans would say to "ouch" - for us to see your lovely visage !)
[kisses the unpatched eye]
get well soon!
paper ~
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Battycat said on Mar 22, 2008....
Oh, that must be really sore. I'm sorry but I couldn't help giggling as well :-)
Hope it gets better soon.
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FutureGoddess said on Mar 22, 2008....
OY VEY! Lucy - a scratched cornea is painful! (I know, I just recovered from having ulcerated mine) - But, sorry, I did have to giggle over the irony of the client meeting.... couldn't have planned it any better than if you had broken your toe and had an appointment with a foot doctor for a new client.
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pickersplock said on Mar 22, 2008....
Feeling any better today, Lu? -
ALIENated said on Mar 22, 2008....
Hey, good lookin. You look nothing like Lucille Ball, but dang you are leading her life. That eye patch and meeting the eye guy is a sitcom waiting to happen. Seriously, I thought you had a patch with a string strap, that sort of deal. What you have is obviously a bandage. You will just get sympathy, not laughs and weird looks from you dinner mate. (I am imagining someone who looks like Gale Gordon.) Hope you heal fast. I will mention it to my good friend upstairs.
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ALIENated said on Mar 22, 2008....
Gale Gordon was always being bumfuzzled by Lucy. I figure that may be what your eye guy looks like...
http://www.geocities.com/gale_gordon/GaleTVG2.jpgWear a hat like this and no one will notice the eyepatch ...
http://www.digitallyobsessed.com/cover_art2/ilovelucy1-01.jpg -
moonriver said on Mar 22, 2008....
Lucy, I'm sorry about your pirate eye. It's only now that I read this blog. I thought you were merely setting me up with a bad joke when you posted this same pic in my Bulgarian crush blog.
I hope your pirate eye heals soon -- although with you and your husband's irrepressible humor, I'm sure you'll maximize its fun value while it lasts. Take care, my friend with a pretty pirate smile... :-)
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fearing said on Mar 22, 2008....
I'm sorry about your eye too Lucy. I hope you have damaged it permanently. I hope you forgive me that I laughed a couple of times at the end? -
wombat said on Mar 22, 2008....
I'm sorry about your eye---and believe me I know! When my son was little, he scratched my cornea with his fingernail while I was holding him. One of those freak things. I had never felt anything so painful! I had the patch too--and kept using tape to "pull and hold my eye open" because it hurt to shut it. Hurt to have it open-too, actually. It will just have to heal in it's time. -
CayenneMan said on Mar 22, 2008....
As far as scooping the whole eye out I'm glad you reconsidered, I've been there I've tried it , unless you have the original build sheet it can be a bitch to put back in . . . how about a game of pool ? I'll pray you get well soon because I'm just a typical white guy.
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GrapeKoolaid said on Mar 22, 2008....
So... What is your Pirate name? :D
Sorry... Couldn't resist...
Hope you feel better and get off the patch soon! :D
Oh and... Nice pic. You're quite the looker. Even with the patch. ;)
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vacantmind said on Mar 22, 2008....
That sucks! No pirate jokes from me. Hope it heals well!
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Alyss said on Mar 22, 2008....
Ouch! Damage to eyes is really scary. I'm glad you got it checked out, though I'm sorry that it was worth the trip so to speak. Hope it stops hurting and heals up asap. -
botoni said on Mar 22, 2008....
Well my dear, you ve found a whole different meaning to being on the patch! This one, unlike the smokers patch, is not meant to make you quit seeing. I m sure you ll be the belle of the ball at the meeting. I m equally sure you ll be the main attention getter. Play it for the sympathy is my advice......ooops! I think I ve joined up with the joksters....sorry! -
lfbno7 said on Mar 22, 2008....
damn. what a drag. -
cotteralladams3 said on Mar 22, 2008....
Okay. -
destinydiva said on Mar 22, 2008....
wow its cool to finally get to see what you look like! :-)
see everything happens for a reason...if you hadnt got something in your eye you wouldnt have posted about it and rupe wouldnt have posted you a pirate song and we wouldnt have got to see what ya look like :-)
I'm just kidding, aww sorry its not good I know, but it is funny...you gotta admit?? lol eye doctor...patch...awww lucy, this could only happen to you my friend!! :-) xx
cant wait to hear how your dinner goes ;-) xx
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RollingC said on Mar 22, 2008....
Hopefully it doesn't hurt too much but you'll get better. Had to wear a patch once and luckily the med for my scratched cornea didn't hurt....just uncomfortable that's all.... the cornea went back to normal after about a week.
Rc
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TaintedAtBirth said on Mar 22, 2008....
You know why pirates are so mean ? -
skald said on Mar 22, 2008....
Oh my god, I am sorry to hear about that Lucy. I hope you will be O.K. By the way you are a very beautiful young woman. -
Lucytorial said on Mar 22, 2008....
Hello to everyone! this post blew out and I didn't expect that..... so rather than individual thanks everyone jokes and concern...
The night was weirdo plus man, the eye doctor cracked up laughing when we told him what happened.. as the night wore on though it started hurting more and more and I was at a point where I thought, I really need to lie down! So we went to the hotel room and crashed.
Its pretty funny though, seriously who else could have it happened to but moia!... giggling my tits off still.
The drops they gave me are strange, make my eye feel all funny, and you know what I didn't expect??? You can taste them about 15 minutes after putting them in and they are GROSS plus! terrible taste.....
Oh and thanks to everyone for telling me I'm pretty and all that, does wonders for your ego especially as I took the photo after getting back from the hospital, all red faced, embarrassed, teary eyed... thats made my day!
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queenparanoia said on Mar 28, 2008....
ouch.... are you still wearing your eye patch???
