As some of you may know, I've been away to attend the funeral of my best friend's mother.  She was one of the dearest people I've ever known.  I'm blessed to have been loved by her.  She was truly my second mom.

She died on Monday and I was there by Tuesday and stayed until today (Friday).  I stayed in a hotel because I knew my friend would need some private grieving time because she is as strong as they come when it comes to facing the world.  Along with her heart of gold, she got those traits from her mother. That being said, there were a few things she didn't want to do on her own, so she waited for me.

As I checked in to the hotel, she brought her father to town.  She wanted me to help pick out a suit for him to wear to the funeral.  This once feisty ornery man now has Alzheimer's and she wanted me to help her with him.  Bless his heart, he still remembers me if only in fleeting moments.  I was a friendly face that was nice to him at the very least.  He understood that his wife was gone, but due to the nature of his illness he would sometimes forget and then be reminded again.  He relived that initial pain we all felt over and over.

We found this dear man a suit and then took him to get some suckers.  Like a little child, he wanted them and we weren't going to say no.

My friend isn't married and has no siblings.  She has shouldered all the responsibility of caring for her aging parents.  She's done it lovingly and without complaint.  There is surely a golden seat waiting for her in heaven.

At their home, it was my job to keep track of all the food that was brought to the house.  A neighbor had made her a personalized book for tracking food, memorials, etc.  So, that was my job.  I kept it organized and put the food where she wanted it.

She was undecided about viewing her mom at the funeral home.  She really didn't know if she wanted to.  I told her that I would go with her or else go on my own.  She also wasn't sure what it would do to her dad to take him to the funeral home.

This was all in the first day and a little overwhelming for her.  I think she needed to sleep on it.  We all have to process our grief in our own ways.

The next day, she had someone watch her dad for a couple of hours and we went out to lunch for a break.  It was a good time for talking. She needed an ear about what she now faces with her dad.  Her mom watched over him mostly.  My friend's career involves lots of travel and she just can't keep him at home now.  She's already started looking for a place he will be happy at.  Lord knows how he will miss her and she him.

She had decided to view her mother and I went with her.  It was very hard.  We both cried, but we got through it.  She looked very peaceful and angelic.  She will suffer no more.  My friend told me that she wanted to bring her dad to help him understand it better.  So we went and got him and brought him back to see her. I asked if she would like to take him in private or have me go along.  She wanted me to go with them, so I did.

That dear man, held his wife's hand and said, "My wife.  God bless you."  My friend explained to him very gently that this would be the last time we see her, so he could take all the time he wanted.  He was weepy and said he couldn't stay long.

The funeral was in a packed church.  The processional to the cemetery was a long one with most of those paying their respects attending the luncheon that followed.  I'm sure my friend's mom was smiling from heaven when she saw the send off she received.  There were many friends and family who came to honor her.

With the help of some of my friend's cousins we got all the thank you's sorted out for my friend.  All she has to do is put her personal notes in them and put them in the mail.

I really hated leaving her.  Now as things slow down and she has to put her dad in some sort of care facility, her grief is going to really sink in.  I've promised to come back as soon as she feels she wants me to.  She's asked me to help go through some of her mom's things.  Her mom wanted me to have my choice of her angels. 

I already know where I will put this angel.  It will go next to the beautiful green depression glass platter she gave me when I got married ten years ago.  It wasn't new and it shows its age, but the note card that rests on it says it all.

"This meat platter has been in our home for 40 plus years.  Now I would like you to have it and hope that you will use it in your new home.

We wish you much happiness, good fortune and good good health.

Mom"

I love her so much and will miss her terribly.

Thank you for reading.

CW