• quietone said on Mar 20, 2008....

  my 2 cents is that it is still a large percent "cavemanic."  

• wombat said on Mar 20, 2008....

  Not speaking for all men, but about a few I have known.... who just took any comment as attention that they craved.  One guy I knew--all I had to do was go up to him and ask a question about work---he took it as if I was there to give him an opportunity to stare at my chest.   I'm sure it depends on the man.  I don't know if some of them "grow out of it" or not.  This certain one I mentioned probably won't....

• uniquely-ironic said on Mar 20, 2008....

  quietone - LOL, I love the word cavemaniac.  You're probably right.
   
  wombat - that guy sounds like a creep.  You should have drawn a couple of eyes on your chest so that he could have technically been looking you in the eye.

• silverwhisper said on Mar 20, 2008....

  um...duh! ladies, don't be subtle with men, especially strangers. be up front, be honest, and be what you might even consider rude, b/c anything less than that is ambiguous.
  
  ladies, the simple truth is men will not crawl up into a gorrammed ball just b/c you said you aren't attracted to us. we won't don sackcloth and ashes, either. so for pity's sake, get over yourselves. we aren't complete and total wimps.
  
  if you refuse to say "i'm not attracted to you. at all", continued attention from the guy in question is inevitable, and potentially, partially your own damned fault.
  
  ed

• uniquely-ironic said on Mar 20, 2008....

  SW - well now, I think that's a little overkill ed.  I agree about being direct, but draw the line at being rude.  BTW, I have seen men become angry and violent over being rejected by a woman.

• nytquill17 said on Mar 20, 2008....

  I think that women have a part to play in this too, from a social/biological point of view.  Biologically, women are wired to make and maintain social connections (all the cave-moms got together and formed a neighborhood watch while the cave-dads were out bringing home the mammoth).  And women are often socialized (or do it instinctively) to use their sex appeal to make those connections.  Many behaviors that are considered friendly networking type stuff, are often only a smidgen away from something that would be considered flirting.
  
  So add to that the cavemanic stuff and the fact that most guys have more trouble grasping subtleties in language or expression and there's your problem!
  

• beyondtheveil said on Mar 20, 2008....

  unique- I totally believe it. I've seen the mistake more than I'd care to estimate.
  
  Personally, I never assumed, its vain and begging to look stupid. Age could make a difference. Even vain people can learn.
  

• silverwhisper said on Mar 20, 2008....

  u-i: sorry, someone hit my rant button, apparently. :D
  
  ed

• uniquely-ironic said on Mar 20, 2008....

  nytquill - There is that about the women.  Socially we are encouraged to "be nice" so that we find it hard to say "I'm not interested" for fear of being considered rude.
   
  BTV - You sound wiser than most not to assume.  I suppose those who don't assume get shot down more, but perhaps the odds of making a connection go up as well.
   
  SW - that's okay my friend.  It happens to the best of us.

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