GracefullyGrowing's tags:
My dear dear friend has been in a terrible car accident.  I'm so grieving for her right now.  I want to be with her, but it's just not possible.
 
She and her boyfriend were traveling on Wednesday.  They were hit in the rear by a car, and then hit another car, on the interstate highway. 
 
She has a broken right collar bone, dislocated shoulder, a ruptured spleen, and a crushed pelvis.  She's already had two sugeries and will go to rehab after leaving the hospital, and was just told today her baby died also.  (This is the second child she's lost to death.) 
 
Things are touch and go for her boyfriend right now - he has been comatose since the accident.  He has a head injury and he has had some brain swelling.  He has several broken ribs, a fractured back, a punctured lung, a compound fracture of the left femur, and  several cuts and bruises.  He had internal bleeding. They drilled a hole in his head to relieve some of the pressure.  She has not been able to see him. 
 
I would ask for your prayers for them, and for some healing energy as well, if you could spare some.


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Comments

  • blastfromthepast said on Feb 24, 2008....
    Grace:  I'm so terribly sorry to hear this news!  My thoughts and prayers most certainly go out to your friends.
  • the_infernal_optimist said on Feb 24, 2008....
    That's horrible. :( My thoughts are with them, and prayers said.

    ~Infernal
  • PAPERBACKWRITER said on Feb 24, 2008....

    They are in my prayers, dearest Grace.

    paper ~


  • MissMimi said on Feb 24, 2008....
    Grace, this is just terrible.  My heart goes out to your friend.  I'll keep her in my thoughts and prayers.
  • GracefullyGrowing said on Feb 24, 2008....
    All of us thank all of you.  I will keep things updated as I get news.
     
    ~Grace~
  • quietone said on Feb 24, 2008....
    I am sending all the green I can muster grace... even a bit for you too.  This is a lot for one person to have to go through.  {{{hugs}}} saying prayers as well.
  • fearing said on Feb 24, 2008....
    I'll be praying.  Please keep us posted.
    hugs.
  • Mamie said on Feb 24, 2008....

    Dear God....you are the divine healer. We ask for your miracles to be directed this way...to heal their physical bodies and to reach and comfort their hearts and souls so that they fully know that you are with them. We all thank you for the gift of the baby who no doubt brought joy to this couple just in knowing there are life ordained by you...and for those who suffer through the trials of not knowing your will in this circumstance, I ask you to wrap them in your arms and provide the peace that only comes from knowing you. Amen.

    Love to you Gracie....

  • mobil said on Feb 24, 2008....
    This is an awful story to hear on a Sunday morning Grace, I've sent my prayers your way and theirs. God Bless
  • nursecutie said on Feb 24, 2008....

    Oh no!! This is just heartbreaking :( I am so sorry for your friend.......I will keep her in my prayers for you. How sad!

    {{{{{hugs for you and everyone involved}}}}

    xxoo natalie xxoo

  • evil_twin said on Feb 24, 2008....
    I am so sorry about this, Grace. My thoughts will definitely be with your friend and her boyfriend. The whole thing is just a horrible tragedy :-(

    -evil_twin LA
  • Jenna said on Feb 24, 2008....

     

    Grace.....my prayers are added to those above.  I am also praying for you!  I am sorry you have this burden right now.  God bless.....I wish you strength!

  • Mr_Box said on Feb 24, 2008....
    That's a really sad story, Grace. My heart goes out to you and your friend. I hope her boyfriend will pull through. I'll keep them in my thoughts.
  • Alyss said on Feb 24, 2008....
    I am hoping for the best for your friend & her family.
  • polarheart said on Feb 24, 2008....
    Dear GG I have prayed for your friends.
     
    ((((Big hug))))
    Polar xox
  • gingersoul said on Feb 24, 2008....

    Grace........no prayers from me....but i do wish your friends will make it thru this ordeal and with no consequences.

    It must be horrible for you not being able to be at their side. Be strong.

  • TinSoldier said on Feb 24, 2008....
    Thinking of your friend and her boyfriend...
  • Me-Myself&I said on Feb 24, 2008....
    so be it! the prayer is a done deal. i hope a speedy recover. ....see how life can change in a wink of a eye. wow take care.~see ya
  • secretlife said on Feb 24, 2008....
    Grace:  this is a horrible thing to read about.  i'm adding my prayers to everyone else's.
  • Sandman said on Feb 24, 2008....
    Grace ----- You have all my hopes and wishes for your friends to get better and make a complete recovery ! ! ! !   Sandman
  • rupert7 said on Feb 24, 2008....
    Grace -  this puts knots in the stomach,it is so horrible,my heart goes out to all involved in this tragedy and I extend my best hopes and wishes to all, and it is so sad about the baby too. I am truly sorry.
  • GrapeKoolaid said on Feb 24, 2008....
    Keeping you and yours in my thoughts...
  • soleme said on Feb 24, 2008....

    I'm so sorry that you can not be with your friend at a time like this. Will keep you , your friend, and her boyfriend  in my prayers. I'm sorry for the loss of their baby.

     

  • GracefullyGrowing said on Feb 24, 2008....
    I have extended your prayers and wishes to my friend.  We all thank you very much.  There is no news to report right now.
  • allswell said on Feb 24, 2008....

    Grace...I'm so sorry for your friend, my heart and prayers will go out to her and her boyfriend for a full recovery.

    {{hugs}} alls:)   

  • moonriver said on Feb 24, 2008....
    grace, i got so wrapped up in something else i didn't notice your blog until now... my thoughts are with your two friends.

  • GracefullyGrowing said on Feb 24, 2008....
    Here is the latest news I just received from my friend . . . .
     
    Her boyfriend is not showing any signs of imorovement. He is on a ventilator, unable to breathe on his own.  He doesn't respond to anything, he's still in a coma. 
     
    It will be another 2 weeks before my friend will walk with a walker, and weeks longer before graduating to a cane.  She runs several times a week, and the doctor has said she will never run again. 
     
    With her boyfriend in such serious condition she has not even begun to start the grieving process for the baby.

  • CreativeWoman said on Feb 24, 2008....
    I will also pray for your friend and her family. 

    CW
  • GracefullyGrowing said on Feb 25, 2008....
    Thanks everyone!
     
    Latest update - as of this morning the boyfriend has been transferred to a more capable facility and is at this moment (around noon eastern) in surgery again to relieve swelling of the brain.
     
    My friend is in a lot of pain - emotional and physical - but is hanging in there like the strong capable woman that she truly is and I know her to be.
     
    I'm off to work and will update with what news I have when I return home.
     
    ~Grace~
  • GracefullyGrowing said on Feb 25, 2008....

    Latest update . . .

    The boyfriend of my dear friend died at 8:19 this (Monday) morning.

    I feel unable to help and console.

    Please, continue your prayers/thoughts for my friend and their respective families.

    Thank you so much!

    ~Grace~

  • Sandman said on Feb 25, 2008....
    I'm so sorry to hear of her boyfriends passing !  My prayers are with her and all who suffered in this tragic accident . There are no more words i can say but i have endless supply of hugs of which i send big warm teddy bear hugs to you ! !
     
    Sand
  • GracefullyGrowing said on Feb 25, 2008....
    My heart felt thanks to all.  It's very helpful to have all your comments.
     
    I'm feeling pretty pissed off right now.  I *know* in the front of my mind it's just a stage of grief to be pissed off.  But in my heart it feels awful.
     
    I'm pissed that this woman has been through enough loss and grief to take down even the strongest of us. . . BEFORE this accident . . . and now she must go through it twice again.
     
    I'm pissed because I'm stuck here, unable to do a damn thing.  Just like I was a couple of weeks ago when there was another death for me to deal with.  Then I get pissed at myself for even thinking of that, because my friend has been through five times that, so what right do I have to be at all concerned about that at all.
     
    I'm pissed that there is nothing I can say.  There is no comfort I can give.  There is no piece of me I can transfer to give strength, or hope, to *really* help her right now.  Her bones will heal, her body recover (and thank GOD for that!!) but what will mend her heart?  What can I offer her that will fill the hole she's feeling - right NOW?  The only healer of her heart now is time.  But for now, there is helplessness and grief.
     
    And, the most horrid of all . . . I'm pissed that she's ALL alone.  She has no one with her right now.   She's been alone all day.   Just her, her grief, and her pain - physical, emotional, and mental pain.  "There is no more light" she said to me.  It breaks my heart to hear this, but hers is "in a thousand pieces".
     
    I'm pissed that she's so tied to that hospital bed, and can not even move because of her injuries.  She can't even distract herself from her pain with a diversion.  She's normally a *very* active person.  She copes with all that's on her plate with activity like working out, and running, and working very hard.  But right now, she's got none of her normal coping mechanisms.  How unfair that feels to me.
     
    Last, but not least by far - I'm pissed that there's no one, or no thing, to blame.  This just happens.  All of this -  the pain, the death, the being alone, it's all a part of . . . living. 
     
    Sometimes living just sucks, and I'm pissed off about that too.
     
    ~Grace~
  • polarheart said on Feb 26, 2008....
    Grace, this is terribly sad to hear about. . .it touches me deeply too.  I just want to say, that what you are doing i.e. calling her, giving your love and your friendship does account for much and it does make a difference to her.  Also the prayers that you and others here have offered up all make a difference. 
     
    I understand coz you would like to take this all away from her, but you cant.  Your friend has so much to deal with right now and it is your job just to be there for her as much as you possibly can. . .yes, two people died in this accident, but we must also give thanks that SHE is still alive. . .when you are feeling low choose to focus on this.
     
    Much love and sympathy
    Polar
  • rupert7 said on Feb 26, 2008....
    i AM SO SORRY...THERE IS TOO MUCH DEATH AT THE MOMENT....TOO MUCH!
  • GracefullyGrowing said on Feb 26, 2008....
    Ok, I got a little sleep, and I'm not pissed anymore. 
     
    Thanks much Polar, Rupert. 
     
    ~Grace~
  • Mamie said on Feb 26, 2008....
    oy. This is just tragic. God is with her, she is not alone. Just know that, Grace. She will free-fall right into his hands...and she will be safe there...to heal...and to live. I am so sorry for your loss and for the anxiety that you are suffering through. I am not sure what else to say, but offer this: ((((((hugsssssss)))))) xo, M
  • GrapeKoolaid said on Feb 26, 2008....
    Sorry for your loss...  We're always here listening if you want to talk.  I know that it does little to dull the pain, but every little bit helps.  Keep them in your thoughts. 

    I will keep you in mine. 

    Grape. 
  • GracefullyGrowing said on Feb 27, 2008....
    Thanks much Mamie, Grape.  I and my friend SO apreciate it.
     
    I'm staying in contact with my friend as much as possible.  To say she is having a hard time is an understatement.  There are no words, without writing poetry, to describe the depth of it all.  But, she is hanging in there. She's a pillar of strength, and she doesn't even realize it.  I admire her so.
  • silverwhisper said on Feb 28, 2008....
    grace, i'm so sorry about your friend--that's horrible! i can't begin to imagine what she's going through...

    nor can i imagine what you're going through--this has to be incredibly difficult for you, too. i know, you're going to say that it's nothing compared to what your friend is dealing with--and you're right, of course. but having said that, this combination of powerlessness and grief you're feeling is difficult for most people to handle, i suspect. you have a support network of your own, right?

    ed
  • GracefullyGrowing said on Feb 28, 2008....
    An update . . .
     
    Yesterday my friend was told she has pneumonia.  Last night she was telling me she had some cramps.   Today the doctors told her she had a blood clot in her uterus and they put her in ICU.
     
    Upon further testing, it was determined that the issue was not *just* a blood clot, but an aneurysm of the abdominal aorta, which apparently is a result of the blunt trama sustained in the accident last week.  At 9:00 PM (mountain time) they took her into surgery.
     
    I am awaiting news.   Please, please, continue your prayers.
  • GracefullyGrowing said on Feb 29, 2008....
    Latest Update . . .
     
    The aneurysm ruptured and to put it bluntly had she not been in the hospital when it happened she would have died.  The surgery was successful, however, there was a lot of internal bleeding that had to be controlled.  She is back in the ICU now, she is still sedated and on a respirator and is receiving blood tranfusions.  She has 2 drain tubes and several medications going into her veins.  They are giving her blood thinners to prevent further blood clots. Her blood pressure is quite low, and her heart rate is a high. I don't know that I would say that she is "stable" at this time, maybe I should say she is critically stable. 
  • Alyss said on Feb 29, 2008....
    Your friend has been through so much... I am continuing to hold her and her family in my thoughts and hoping for the best for them.
  • Mamie said on Mar 01, 2008....
    How is your friend doing, Grace? And how are you? I am sure this is so stressful, we are all praying for her and for you too. blessed be, mamie
  • GracefullyGrowing said on Mar 01, 2008....
    Latest Update . . .
     
    My friend is out of ICU.  The doctor has told her she is lucky to be alive.  She is on oxygen and getting breathing treatments.   She's hoping to go home in 4-5 days. 
     
    So, I think the danger is passed for now. 
     
    Thank you all again for your prayers.
  • the_infernal_optimist said on Mar 01, 2008....
    That's wonderful news, Grace! :)

    ~Infernal
  • silverwhisper said on Mar 02, 2008....
    i'm glad she's physically all right, grace, but i'm scared for her emotional/mental state...

    ed
  • Thechildwithin said on Mar 02, 2008....

    Grace

    I have been away from SC for quite some time, and I just read this post.

    I am so sorry to hear about your friend's accident and recent losses.  Please keep us all updated on how she is doing.

    I will definately send prayers to both of you.

    TCW

  • GracefullyGrowing said on Mar 05, 2008....
    Well, while my friend is not yet out of the hospital, I *do* think the most dangerous part of her ordeal has passed.  While she still is fighting an infection on top of her injuries, and recovering from several surgeries, it seems to me the darkness is going away from the whole situation.  Her spirits are a bit higher, and thus carrying her out of that deep tunnel.
     
    Her ordeal has changed her life beyond recognition.  But it's also changed my life in several ways. To watch all of this, even from a distance, has been surreal but taught me many things.
     
    I can't express how grateful I am.  To God, to her, and to all of you who prayed and sent positive thoughts.   Now we just have to keep doing so until she gets out of the hospital, then through rehab, and back to day to day life.
     
    ~Grace~
  • silverwhisper said on Mar 05, 2008....
    thank you for the update, grace. i've been worried about your friend. if you think it would help, please ler her know that someone who's never even heard of her until a few days ago is pulling for her.

    ed
  • Sandman said on Mar 10, 2008....
    I haven't been on in a while and i'm glad to hear things are looking up for your dear friend . Like Silver said same for me ! If it helps ! Please keep us posted on her condition ! Sandman

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