We shop at Wal-Mart. It's cheap and it's close to our apartment. Everything else (like wonderful Target :-D) is across town. But man, there are some weirdos - and worse - who also shop at WM!
When you go anywhere with small children, people stop and say hey or give them compliments or whatever. We're used to that. But sometimes people just stare or give an odd look, and that makes me a little nervous, especially if they look away really fast when I notice.
I saw one guy like that today, some dude in a blue shirt. I'm not sure who he was looking at of the four of us (little one was in the cart DH was pushing, and I was just holding linebacker baby because it's easier for short trips than getting a second cart just for him). As soon as I met his gaze, he looked away, but I think I flinched too. Just something hostile about him. I tried to shake it off, but I had that buzzing "Something's not right here" poking feeling all the way through the checkout line.
The guy in the blue shirt strode past us as we were pushing the cart into the little entrance/exit area, and then he wandered off to the side toward the carts. Something made me jerk my head around, and I saw a second guy, in a red shirt, waiting by the exit with a bag. He looked at the first guy (!) and started toward me -- I had fallen a little behind DH, because linebacker baby was getting squirmy in my arms. Nobody else was in that area.
I had the sudden impression of being a mouse between two cats, so I looked daggers at the guy coming toward me (who was within five or six feet and closing) and bolted for the exit. It wasn't until I caught up with DH in the parking lot that I dared to turn and see if anyone was behind me. They weren't.
DH also turned, looking at my backpack-style purse. I thought that was strange until he said, "Did you feel that? That guy?"
"The one in the red shirt, by the door?"
"Yeah...there was something not right about him. Something felt really wrong there. That's why I was looking at your purse. I thought maybe he'd get behind you and try to slip something out of it, but it's all closed."
This from my DH, the dense-as-a-bedpost guy when it comes to people-reading!
I suppose I could be miffed at him for not letting me walk in front or something once he noticed the guy, but he had little one to think about in that situation. I can't blame him for that, and I'm fast enough to think/talk/run my way out of most sticky situations. You don't live here very long without encountering something like that, but it creeps me out every damned time. With less advance notice, I very well might have been robbed today. Right there in freaking Wal-Mart. :-p
But I wasn't. :)
the_infernal_optimist posted on Feb 23, 2008
| views: 211
Comments
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evil_twin said on Feb 23, 2008....
That is definitely a freaky story. There really are some creepy people at Wal-Mart. We've run into lots of them out here too. It must be a universal freak hangout. But I'm glad you paid attention to your intuition and got away from the situation as fast as possible.
A lady with a baby is an easy target I'd assume because your first thought would be to protect the baby and not your purse. And then they run off scot free, because you're not likely to chase after them either.
I'm happy you were safe though and so was your purse!
-evil_twin LA
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Lucytorial said on Feb 23, 2008....
I love it when my instincts and intuition serve me well like that, I tend to listen more intently afterwards..
glad you listened to yours.. tis creepy.
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nursecutie said on Feb 23, 2008....
Oh I made a blog once about a creepy guy who followed me around Walmart and wanted to help me pick out underpants! He gave me the heebie jeebies! I don't think he wanted my purse but me instead......and that is even more scary!I am so glad you were ok and that nothing happened. You were right to react the way you did and get away from him. Who knows what he was after? *shudders*Always be careful!! {{{hugs}}}xxoo natalie xxoo -
Twylarants said on Feb 23, 2008....
That's your mother's intuition, Tio, protecting you and your family. You see and hear and feel everything when you're a Mama Bear. -
lfbno7 said on Feb 24, 2008....
It sounds to me that you were right. It can always be just some harmless guy looking dangerous through no fault of his own, but your description sounds like he was intent on robbing you. And he failed.
It reminds me of something from Tony Blauer, the worldwide expert at self defense, really one of the best. He describes the "ranges" at which fights take place. Aside from the usual ones, such as grappling range, close quarter (elbow range), punching range, and kicking range, he also deals with more distant ranges and talks about strategies to use. At one of the more distant ranges, like you were in with your attacker, the fight was already on, you sensed it, you knew it, and you used one of Tony Blauer's favorite techniques at that range, you got the hell out of there. You won the fight, literally. It had already begun, and you won it. -
travelr712 said on Feb 24, 2008....
i like that lfb. i'm a firm believer in the idea that the only reason to fight is to put an end to the fight, and if that means you get the hell out of there before it starts, then everyone is better off.ya know, infernal, when i was in my early 20's and in college, my psyche professer had me and another guy in class stand up. she then said 'this is what criminals look like.' i was highly offended, because i am NOT a criminal. i was totally misjudged, just because this woman didn't understand or like me. so yes, sometimes intuition can be wrong. but in your case, it was MUCH better to be safe than be sorry! you did the right thing.but that does bring up an issue that's been bothering me for years. i'm a harmless, friendly person, but if i'm in a store or some public place, and a child smiles at me and says hello, i have to think twice before i respond because i'm worried about a nervous parent misinterpreting my intentions. so that translates into children being ignored in public, which can cause them to feel inadequate. so i usually just look quickly and smile at them and say hello, then look the parent in the eye and smile at them quickly, and then walk away and not pay any attention to them afterward. that seems to diffuse the situation. after all, i look like a criminal, so i'm sure i make them nervous. -
Twylarants said on Feb 24, 2008....
Trav, my husband has the same problem when I'm not with him. He just adores little ones in a totally innocent grandpa-type way. When our kids were small, we were happy if someone made a fuss about them in public...that meant they were behaving themselves.
But times have changed and there are predators out there (who are not you or my husband), so parents have to be careful, and friendly strangers, male and female, have to be careful. Hubby and I do what you do...smile at the little one(s), then smile at their adult.
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travelr712 said on Feb 24, 2008....
yeah, sad isn't it twyla? -
the_infernal_optimist said on Feb 24, 2008....
Kyle: You know, I never thought of myself as an easy target, but you're right, at least when I have my kids with me.
Lucy: Very creepy.
Nat: I remember that post! That was really scary stuff! ((hugs)) to you, too! We'll both be careful.
Twyla: TIO the Mama Bear...that's a funny mental image, but you're right. :)
Mr. 7: Thanks. I think I might read more on that Tony guy. He sounds like he really knows his stuff.
Trav: I'm kind of torn about things like you described. I mean, on the one hand, it irks me if DH looks at a little kid just to be friendly and gets a dirty look from the mom, but on the other hand, she has no idea who he is or what his intent is (esp. if we're not all together). It's sad that you can't just trust everybody. I still like it when people talk to my kids, if they're talking to me too.
~Infernal
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Twylarants said on Feb 24, 2008....
It's very sad Tio, but it doesn't sound as though those guys in Walmart were just innocent grandpa types like Hubby and Trav and Mr Opimist.
I talk to all the little kids shopping with their parents or grandparents in the store I work in, but first of all, I'm in uniform, so the adult knows I work there, plus it's hit and run with me...I'm on my way somewhere so I don't linger...it's a quick "hiya cutie pie!" as I rush past them.
But I've noticed in the past few years that kids don't automatically respond...they check with their adult first. I think that's from being told not to speak to strangers, and it's a good idea. It shows the parent that the kids take the warning seriously.
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travelr712 said on Feb 24, 2008....
yeah infernal, i know what you mean. that's why i always try to involve the adults so it doesn't look like i'm focusing on the child.twyla, there's a kid's video out now that teaches them not to talk to strangers without their 'safety adult' nearby, and to always check with that adult first. sounds like that ideal is catching on? -
uniquely-ironic said on Feb 24, 2008....
I'm glad you trusted your gut instinct. It's usually right.It is cosmically weird how the number of freaks you see will multiply dramatically when you shop at WalMart. Too bad the economics drive us there without the benefit of normal shoppers. -
Mr_Box said on Feb 24, 2008....
I'm always on the lookout for suspicious people when I go someplace like Walmart. It's usually so crowded and chaotic that anything could happen. Not to mention some of the stellar people the place attracts.Once when I was shopping there I watched some woman try to run out of the store with a shopping cart filled with stuff. She wasn't even sneaky. She just figured if she ran fast enough no one would stop her.Wrong! It was interesting to watch security tackle her to the ground. I have no idea what she was thinking.I'm glad that you trusted your instincts and got the hell away from that situation. Good for you, for keeping your guard up. Better safe than sorry. -
Eilan said on Feb 24, 2008....
trav, did the psych professor really not like you, or was she unsuccessfully trying to make a point that most criminals look like Average Joes/Janes?
We were at the playground with the girls a couple of summers ago, and my husband was helping our kids go across some monkey bars. This little girl (who looked to be about three years old and seemed to be unattended--and this was at a playground adjoining the lake at an unguarded public beach) asked him to help her as well, so he did. He said he would have felt bad if he didn't. The mother eventually showed up and she glared at my husband for a while, but she didn't say anything.
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travelr712 said on Feb 24, 2008....
she just didn't like me is all, and made no secret of the fact. not exactly the treatment you'd expect from a teacher at a christian college, no? and the reason she used for singling us out was because we both had long hair, mine was just below my collar at the time. -
merlin said on Feb 25, 2008....
intuition is a great, its like a sixth sense -
silverwhisper said on Feb 28, 2008....
well done, infernal. i don't spend a lot of time in walmarts--there really aren't any nearby--but on the times i've been inside 'em, i've been left thinking the freak quotient is pretty high.
i'm glad that things turned out OK, although i was a little worried as i was reading--i could almost feel time slowing down as you were describing your exit.
i guess this means you and mr. infernal won initiative, huh?[/geek] :D
ed -
Eilan said on Feb 28, 2008....
When my girls were at gymnastics the other night, I heard some of the other mothers saying there had been a fistfight at our Wal-Mart the day before.
This doesn't have anything to do with anything--I just had to share, and hearing about our local Wal-Mart experience made me think of Infernal. :D
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the_infernal_optimist said on Feb 28, 2008....
merlin: It is great!
ed: [rofl] I guess we did! :-D
Eilan: I'm not so sure that's the sort of mental leap I want people to make re: me, but that's funny! WM is definitely not a classy place, but I don't know that there's ever been a brawl at ours.
~Infernal
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Eilan said on Feb 28, 2008....
Infernal: Well, it wasn't you I thought of really, except that you'd blogged about Wal-Mart. ;)
Unfortunately, this is the second fistfight at our Wal-Mart in recent memory. My friend was there at 5:00 am the day after Thanksgiving a few years ago and a couple of folks got into a brawl over cheap computers.