Am I seeing this right?  29 days this Feb.???
This has been the worst Feb. in years.  I guess it could always be worse, but that doesn't mean right now isn't pretty fucking shitty.  In the 10 years I've lived in VA, the only one who has ever been able to hold it together, through Feb., every Feb., is Jeamie.  And that may be cause we don't see each other all that often.  The only constant in all of these relationships is me.  It has to be me, I'm doing something wrong.  Something must be very, very wrong with me. 
The tranny told me I'm addicted to bad, unhealthy relationships.  What shim doesn't understand is that's all that I've been able to find.  Including shim.  I am cutting shim lose, starting today.  I hate when friends get all fuckin' judgmental on me.  It seems like I listen to their crazy bullshit, and I don't judge, act supportive, but it's like asking for the world to get them to do it back.  Sometimes shim lectures me like a parent, but being real shitty about it.  I can't let it go on any longer.  And everything that comes out of shims mouth is friggin' insane.  Shim was lecturing me yesterday, and I almost lost my cool and said some really shitty things.  Which I guess I'll say here, cause wtf, this is why I write.  Shim told me I will never get anywhere in life, to which I was like, "Well, I'm 30, college graduate, own a house, and have a good job.  I'd say I'm doing alright."  To which shim stfu about that, and moved on to something else to lecture me about, some more bullshit.  Something about me smoking before work, which I haven't done in weeks now.  I've given that up, which I'd previously told shim, but shim's brain isn't much more complex than a slugs.  So when I mentioned that, shim was like, "Oh."  Then silent, I guess trying to come up with more shit to try to put me down.  I could feel my face starting to burn and evil words begging to spring from my lips.  Halfway shouting, I was like, "How the fuck would you like me to judge you??  You don't think I could say mean shit about you?  I try to be supportive, I don't fuckin' judge my friends.  What the hell is the matter with you??"  At which point my man walked in the house.  For some reason I didn't want him to know that I was upset, so I told shim I had to go and just hung up.  Ok, so that's the situation, here's what I almost said. 
The competition is pretty stiff, but you may be the biggest loser I've met in this area.  Let's evaluate your situation.  You are 35 years old.  You got laid off at the ship yard cause you're a guy but started wearing women's clothes and make up to work.  On your last day there, right before you left, you went in the bathroom and donned a slutty dress, made up your face like a hooker, and walked out like that in front of everyone.  You rent a house in a crack neighborhood and your wife, although in her upper 30s, is a cashier at mcdonald's.  Your house is filthy and roach infested.  And it smells bad.  You've told me you're not a daily bather.  You got implants, but they only make you look more disgusting, as they're too high up on your chest, almost in your neck, and spread really far apart.  And they're hairy.  I wish I didn't know this, but you kept whipping them out when I so kindly tried to help you out and take some pics of you for your myspace.  Speaking of the day I took those pics, do you remember the reason for that?  You had gone out and blown some guy you met off the internet for 110 dollars, and called me up all excited about it, cause now you could buy some new clothes!  You ended up buying this tiny slutty black dress, and knee high black leather stilletos.  You looked like what you are, a tranny hooker.  Your dark five o'clock shadow gleamed under the layers of white powder you'd slapped on.  Your hair looked greasy and you stunk of those putrid little cigars you smoke, cause they are a dollar a pack.  You looked fucking disgusting, all around disgusting, there's no better way to say it.  You also got angry at me that night for refusing to put my purse down after seeing a roach scamper towards it.  You talk about sucking cock in front of your kids, who are like, 8 and 10.  Aside from all this, you're not even a good person!  You're not retarded, but your personality sucks, and you have no sense of humor.  You are a miserable human being, and I would be too, if I were you.  I have my faults, we all do, but GodDAMN.  I hope you choke and die on the next cock you suck.
God it sucks being the better person sometimes, cuz I can almost guarantee, never again in my life, will I have the opportunity to say something like that.  Then again, you never know.