It's almost Valentine's Day, and this year, I actually have someone to spend it with! It's been about three years or so since I've actually had a Valentine. I'm a little out of practice as to what is expected of this day. When I had someone, I always made sure I had a card and some flowers, at least. But I wondered a few times if that was really enough. How big of a deal should be made of this day?
I know some guys who don't even remember to get a card, and that's clearly not the way to go if you'd like to sleep inside the house that night. And I know some other guys who go all out and buy diamonds and chocolate and dozens of roses and take their woman out to a $200 dinner. Obviously no woman is going to complain about being pampered too much, but that seems a little excessive. Is it really necessary to say you love someone with all those things?
I like to think of myself as a romantic though. But to me, I think it matters more that whatever you do for someone, it should come from your heart. If the only thing you get is a card, but it's a perfect card that says exactly what the other person feels for you, that should be just as special, if not more so, than getting a bunch of material or consumable things that you probably won't even think about later.
I guess I fall somewhere in between. I always do more than a card, but I don't plot and scheme the day out and drain my bank account either. But my love is still just as strong. And I certainly try to make sure that she knows that every day and not just on the day that the calender says I have to tell her.
So what are your Valentine's Day's usually like? Do you go all out or is it more low key? Do the women out there expect a huge production or are you just happy if your man remembers at all? What about if you're single? Do you hate the day and boycott any and all Valentine's related stuff? Also, do you give Valentine's presents/cards to friends and family or just your sweetheart?
evil_twin posted on Feb 08, 2008
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Comments
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one.way.or.another. said on Feb 08, 2008....
its nice to have a day to celebrate love, but i agree with you, you should let your loved ones know you love them every day of the year not just on valentine's.
and as a woman, i dont want an over the top day or just an ordinary day, something inbetween would be nice..and red roses (:
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beyondtheveil said on Feb 08, 2008....
This is wifey's second most important day after Christmas. Its more important than anniversary were she is fine with dinner and a card.
Its not that she expects a lot of gifts, but she knows I realize the importance to her, so I go out of my way a bit on this day.
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evil_twin said on Feb 08, 2008....
oneway--You can never go wrong with red roses huh? I like to do enough that it shows I love her, but I hope she already knows that. I make sure I say it all the time :-)
beyond--So what is it that you do for her? Do you take her out someplace special and buy her several gifts? I think it's interesting that this day is more important to her than your anniversary is!
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the_infernal_optimist said on Feb 08, 2008....
We don't celebrate it - I've only ever had two romantic interests who did at all, and DH isn't one of them. I'll admit that I'd be entirely blown away by a single rose, but the holiday itself seems kind of like a commercialized meaningless pile of fluff, you know? My anniversary is far more important to me as far as days of celebrating love go!
That said, I'm happy that this will be a great Valentine's Day for you since you have Natalie! :)
~Infernal
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Eilan said on Feb 08, 2008....
Valentine's Day isn't a huge deal for us because our anniversary is February 2nd and we do a fair amount of celebrating then. We usually exchange cards and my husband will sometimes get me roses, but that's pretty much it.
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Zayda said on Feb 08, 2008....
Honestly, we don't really make a huge deal out of Valentine's Day.
We exchange cards and, if we can snag a babysitter, we manage to go out to eat just the two of us (but nothing overly fancy) and perhaps to a movie.
We typically don't do flowers (cut flowers) because I really kind of think they are a waste of money. They last a week at most and then they're gone. And my husband knows I loathe red roses, so he better never buy me any of those. Yes, I'm weird.
He has gotten me a beautiful potted plant before, and those I appreciate more because they can last forever if you have a green thumb. And I bought him Bamboo one year, which lasted for 5-6 years.
If we do exchange gifts on Valentine's day, it's typically something that could be given on any occassion--a CD, a DVD, a book.
But the exchanging of gifts really isn't all that important to us. It's the spending time together. And well, we don't need Valentine's day as an excuse to do that.
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Zayda said on Feb 08, 2008....
Darn it, SC ate half my comment.
We do silly things for V'Day with the little guy though. We buy him a card and usually some conversation hearts and sit around reading them to each other. And we giggle about them alot! :)
Last year, my son was bound and determined to buy my husband a over-sized cappuccino mug that came with a stuffed dog in it. So, I let him. Although, my husband doesn't drink cappuccino or coffee. So, I use the mug, and the dog sits on the rocking chair by our bed. :) -
silverwhisper said on Feb 08, 2008....
valentine's day is important to me, b/c it's the date on which i proposed to my wife. :>
i always do the card, we sometimes do a present, usually a token of some kind, and usually dinner out. :>
ed -
evil_twin said on Feb 08, 2008....
infernal--You guys really don't celebrate Valentine's Day at all? :-( That's kind of disappointing, I'd think. I know it's just a commercialized holiday, but I can't imagine someone not doing anything at all if they have a significant other. I haven't run across very may women who would be okay with that! I think Natalie might be really upset if I didn't do anything.....
eilan--Well happy anniversary a little late! I hope you guys had fun though. At least you mark Valentine's with a little something nice.
zayda--I just commented earlier that you can never go wrong with red roses. But apparently you can if you're married to you! :-P I see how flowers are a bit of a waste. They're expensive and they don't last. I suppose the money could be better spent on something else. I like the idea of exchanging gifts like CD's because I actually think that's better. I know that for me, I'd rather have that than anything else. And I totally agree that spending the time together is the most important part.
silver--I guess it is pretty special since it's the day you proposed! I think a nice evening out is a good thing to do too.
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uniquely-ironic said on Feb 08, 2008....
Valentine's has always been a sore spot with me. I seem to pick guys who can rebuild a computer in 10 minutes, but are clueless when it comes to remembering significant dates. Typically we'll do a nice dinner, or I'll cook one. Flowers have been known to happen.If I had my druthers I'd want a couples massage and a nice dinner (or the other way around). A gift card to Victoria's Secret or some such would also be nice. -
evil_twin said on Feb 08, 2008....
uniquely--I really hope you get a good Valentine's this year. After all, you're getting married shortly after, so he better make it memorable! The couples massage thing sounds interesting. And I think if you hinted around for the Victoria's Secret thing, he'd give you that. After all, he can enjoy it too! -
Mr_Box said on Feb 08, 2008....
I've always done the flowers and candy thing. But along with that, I usually get another little gift. Something I know she wants.
If we can wing it, we'll go out to dinner. But sometimes it's hard to get a sitter because all our usual choices are busy.
I used to be able to count on you, man. You were our Valentine's sitter! Now who are we going to get this year? Just kidding.
I'm glad you have someone to spend the day with now and forever. You guys should have lots of fun. Me and Mel will probably just stay home and order pizza.
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rmuxagirl said on Feb 08, 2008....
I honestly don't like Valentine's Day even when I had someone I didn't like it. I find it to be pointless I mean if you forget the other gets offended or you spend more money than you should. Not to mention singles what are we to do on this day?
But if i did have someone for this crappy day where a man in diapers gets his jollies from shooting people with arrows, I would just want a cozy night in cuddling to a movie.
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evil_twin said on Feb 08, 2008....
Mr. Box--I'm sorry I ruined your plans when I found a life :-P But I know that I've watched Harper for the last two years. She was my Valentine. But I'm sure you guys will figure something out! Enjoy your pizza.
rumuxa--I know how you feel. But I do agree that a cozy night of cuddling and a movie is a good one!
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the_infernal_optimist said on Feb 08, 2008....
Eh, Kyle, you get used to a lot of things if you live with someone the way he is. It's just not his thing. ;-) It bothered me at first, but now I know he's just not big on celebrations in general.
~Infernal
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evil_twin said on Feb 08, 2008....
Infernal--I'm glad you're used to it, so it doesn't bother you that much. But it still sucks! I like certain celebrations. I don't really go crazy with stuff, but I like making an effort at least. I guess everyone is just different huh? -
dailyachesandpains said on Feb 08, 2008....
I've got a GREAT idea for you guys to celebrate your Valentine's Day...DOINK in the head with a ball and eat at the hospital cafeteria! After all, isn't that how you met? :-)We don't celebrate Valentine's Day. We just get Little D. a little something with a card. Mr. D. and I either go to a "heart" event for charity...a lot of heart foundations have Valentine's Day dinners. At least our money is going to a good cause and there's silent auctions as well as other "events" at the function. If we don't attend, we just reply that we won't be there and write out the check for what the dinner would be and donate instead.No matter what you guys do, congratulations to the both of you! I'm still so happy for you! I think we all feel like we've been in this wonderful relationship with you from the beginning!Daily -
lfbno7 said on Feb 08, 2008....
I usually forget it's Valentine's Day. -
secretlife said on Feb 08, 2008....
usually my husband brings me red roses and a card.i get him chocolate covered cherries or dark chocolate rasberry jellies. those are his favorite candies.i always get the kids something - cause they're my valentine's too! -
nursecutie said on Feb 08, 2008....
As you already know I really haven't had any great valentine's days in the past. I hated that day! It was just a sad reminder that I was alone. And the one time I wasn't alone, it wasn't very memorable! My present was concert tickets to see a band I'd never heard of, but that he liked. And then we went to Burger King!
So Kyle anything you do is going to be better than that! LOL! I don't really think it needs to be a huge production but it is nice to make the day special :) But I do already know you love me everyday. You are good at telling me that!
Love you....
xxoo natalie xxoo
ps~my favorite flowers are sunflowers.....roses are ok but I like wildflowers!
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evil_twin said on Feb 08, 2008....
daily--I think I could go for the hospital cafeteria dinner, but I'd rather not get hit in the face again! I think your Valentine's tradition sounds like a good one too. That's really nice of you guys. And thank you for being so happy for us! I'm really happy too :-D
lfbno--Your wife must be very forgiving. Or forgetful herself!
secret--I think your gifts sound perfect. Nice and sweet, but not overdone. My mom always got us candy and cards for Valentine's too.
cutie--Your previous Valentine's experiences were definitely on the lame side. I can't believe you never had a good one before. But I'll make sure this year is much, much better than Burger King at least! Your favorite flowers are duly noted. Love you too....
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lfbno7 said on Feb 08, 2008....
It's complicated. Anyway she'll do whatever she wants to do. -
sweetsoul said on Feb 08, 2008....
I'm putting in another vote for disliking red roses - although I love cut flowers. If you have to buy roses, be a little adventurous. Try pink, peach, white, whatever. I can't stand that roses are so expensive for Valentine's Day due to supply and demand. There are all sorts of other flowers I like just as well or more.No chocolate please.Thinking I might just wrap myself up in a red ribbon. :D -
Zayda said on Feb 08, 2008....
Sweetsoul: See, I knew I felt a kinship with you. ;).
e_t: Honestly, I have never been a huge rose fan, but I especially dislike red roses. I am a fan of white ones, red ones, and orange ones, but I prefer other flowers because I find roses a bit cliché.
I'd much rather have an orchid. Orchids say so much more than roses.
I should say that I don't dislike cut flowers. I simply dislike paying for them. I love the cut flowers that I get from my flower gardens in the spring and the summer. I love having them in the house. I wish we had a bigger yard so I could have more flower gardens for more cut flowers! :)
Actually, I've already bought our Valentine presents this year, and my hubby knows what they are because I had to coordinate with him to make sure nothing else was going on that day. In a few weeks, we are going to see The Lion King. All three of us are going, so this will be the first time we take the little guy to see a musical. -
merlin said on Feb 08, 2008....
I have no idea what to get my hubby! Any suggestions from the guys out there ? -
PassionTraveler said on Feb 09, 2008....
I can't remember the last time I celebrated valentine's day. I'm hoping to do so this year, even if only casually. I'll know next weekend. Pray I have one this year. ;) PT -
CreativeWoman said on Feb 09, 2008....
It sounds like you will make it a special day.
CW
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rumours said on Feb 09, 2008....
HELLO -
pepperman said on Feb 09, 2008....
For me, its not important. -
gingersoul said on Feb 09, 2008....
Kyle....I don't like Valentine's day at all.
Its a huge, prefabricated commercial holiday. More than Xmas...
Funny...we were having this conversation at work just yesterday and i turned out to be the only woman who dislikes it.....lol.. .
But since my daughter loves to celebrate this day...i have always put efforts in giving her something special....her favorite candy, flowers, a cute card....luckily her father has always remembered to do the same too..
Last year he asked me if he could come over and bring her flowers and chocolate, like he used to do to me...i agreed and he showed up at the door and truly made her day..
For me i dont really care.....in Italy when i grew up we didn't have this huge obsession for it....no valentine cards, no special celebrations... only these last 10 years Italian industry got the idea of milking money with it and started to washbrain people about it..
Even though....my ex husband has never forgotten to give me cards and long stem red roses.......the roses could have been replaced by orchids and African lilies.......but i always appreciated his gesture and showed him my appreciation any other single day of the year.....:-)
I have fond memories of him coming home with his face buried in those red roses...and the cards he used to leave on the pillow before leaving for work....
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evil_twin said on Feb 09, 2008....
lfbno--Complicated huh? Well I'm glad she'll do whatever she wants.
sweetsoul--I think any man would be satisfied with a woman wrapped up in a bow! Sounds like a good present to me :-D
zayda--Apparently Nat likes other types of flowers besides roses too! See, I learn something new every day. This is why men are clueless. We assume red roses fix everything :-P Your Valentine's present sounds like a lot of fun! Something the whole family can enjoy.
merlin--Men are fairly easy to please. If you want to go traditional, get him chocolate. Even men like that. Otherwise, get him a CD or something you know he'll like.
PT--I hope you have someone to spend the day with this year!
CW--I'm planning to make it as special as I can :-)
rumours--GOODBYE
pepperman--Hopefully if you have a woman, she feels the same way....
Ginger--I think it's nice that you give your daughter presents, even though you don't really care about celebrating the day. That must make her happy! It sounds like you have nice memories though...
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pepperman said on Feb 09, 2008....
I hope so too Evil Twin! -
circusdoll said on Feb 10, 2008....
Aww, well, it depends on the mood we're in, but most of the time we just make something strange for everybody. Nothing serious in the least-- just madness. Think forest creature finger puppets. *grins* A lot of people don't have valentines, and sometimes it just cheers them up to get something hand-made that has seriously nothing to do with the day. Plus, it means half a trillion people running around waving finger puppets in the air~! *laughs*
Nat's a lovely girl, though, and you're a sweet guy-- whatever the heck you manage, she'll love it to pieces. Besides, you've got hints~! *looks upwards at the 'sunflowers'-post* X3; -
Fallyn said on Feb 14, 2008....
i've never gotten roses from a man other than my father.
it would be nice.
i've never gotten jewelry from anyone.
that would be nice too.
i've never been taken out to a fancy restaurant with anyone but my ex's parents.
it would be nice.
no one's ever brought me chocolates, or little cutesy stuffed animals.....
it would be nice.
just to know that someone thought enough of me to really go out of their way to show me would be really exceptional.
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