I woke up old in Cardiff, I am 47 today and I have waited so long for this birthday, as I have finally reached the age my mammy died at, but I suppose I will have a big celebration at my 48th birthday next year as that’s when I will have outlived her!

And I must outlive her!

The weekend in Wales was lovely though the wind howled and it made me come to the conclusion that Wales is the only country called after the noise it makes….whhooooooooooooowhhooooooo… the wind battered off my fancy five star hotel glass walls.

I have THREE glass walls in my bedroom and they wobbled all night long as the wind shook them.

The shows were great and all the staff at Cardiff Jongleurs are always so nice and helpful, the Welsh audience were so welcoming.

So here I am sitting in Cardiff Airport, and people around me actually want my table, “Can you move to let us all sit down together?” the skinny tall blonde woman asked.

I lift my eyes of this keyboard and see about twenty people including kids crowding me, I look behind me and see LOADS of free fucking tables and wonder why they need MY seat?

“There is a whole area of seating over there” I pointed “I have my laptop out and plugged into this socket and bags spread around me can you possibly all move to one the 70 empty tables behind me?”

They all looked at me like I had bitten a child in the face.

“Well, these are the seats we always sit on” an old man snapped at me.

“No you don’t, you don’t always sit here, coz if you did, I wouldn’t be on your seat, look here’s the deal, its my birthday today and you are annoying me- go away” I hissed and yet again pointed to a swathe of empty tables and seats at my back.

This confused him and his party of friends. They moved on and let me get back to writing this sentence. Honestly I fucking attract nutters in their hordes.

So that’s been my day.