It seemed to center on a badly aging queen named Chip Coffey, and a nauseating, plastic cunt who claimed to have a PhD from a university that someone might actually have heard of, whose name I have mercifully forgotten. These two predatory pieces of human garbage attempted to use the most pathetic scout-camp spook tactics possible to try and convince a group of clearly damaged pre-teens that they needed to nurture their 'special gifts,' which evidently involve hallucinating or just making shit up to please these so-called adults. Right. Either way the filthy sproggen needed serious medication. "That was the scariest thing I've ever seen in my life" - I think I remember one of them saying. Well DUUH - what are you like, 10? Prior to that, I'm sure LINT was the scariest thing you'd ever seen. Afterward, I'm sure Chip Coffey was given that honor.
Oh - but they see dead people! They read minds! Their peers shun them because of their special abilities. No - dumbass. Their peers shun them because they're clearly socially retarded, likely due to their parents being utter fucking cunts.
Speaking of which, there was also a pack of utter fucking cunts calling themselves their mothers who sat around on their uniformly flabby asses and had a little AA session where they were able to weep unconvincingly and be generally needy about their paranormal crotchfruit. It was like a cross between Oprah and an H. P. Lovecraft novel.
The scene that made me question even my own ability to vomit occurred when the slimy, PhD cunt sat and stared at one of the precious little douchebags, while Quentin Crisp... er... Chip Coffey attempted to guide the fledgling phrenologist into reading CuntWoman's mind. He was supposed to guess what number CW was thinking of. After several seconds of dewey-eyed mawkishness, he blurted a random number, and CuntWoman brightly told him he was right! Astonishing! What a fucking turd and a half. Way to help the child adjust to reality you fucking bitch. But then that's really not the goal, is it? It's much more important for you to enable these dysfunctional little bastards in order to convince the dozen or so viewers that could actually stomach your drivel that you managed to get a degree without swallowing entire swimming pools full of sperm. Hey - at least this gig will keep you off the streets.
This thing was the most horrifying piece of shit I think I'm ever likely to see on either side of the grave. Everyone involved should be drawn and quartered on network television - even the children, even if only to save them from the cold, shriveled fingers of "Uncle Chip" psychically probing their "special areas."
