My grandma is a big fat spammer. There. Yeah, I said it! Every day when I check my email, there is a slimy slice of spam or two from my grandma. The vast majority of them make me cringe, but this one was not just cringe-worthy, it pissed me off. Here is the text of the particularly offensive ham-wannabe: WOW, WHAT A WAKEUP! Dear God: Why didn't you save the school children at ?. .. Moses Lake, Washington 2/2/96 Bethel, Alaska 2/19/97 Pearl, Mississippi 10/1/97 West Paducah, Kentucky 12/1/97 Stamp, Arkansa s 12/15/97 Jonesboro, Arkansas 3/24/98 Edinboro, Pennsylvania 4/24/98 Fayetteville, Tennessee 5/19/98 Springfield, Oregon 5/21/98 Richmond, Virginia 6/15/98 Littleton, Colorado 4/20/99 Taber, Alberta, Canada 5/28/99 Conyers, Georgia 5/20/99 Deming, New Mexico 11/19/99 Fort Gibson, Oklahoma 12/6/99 Santee, California 3/ 5/01 and El Cajon, California 3/22/01? Sincerely, Concerned Student ----------------------------------------------------- Reply: Dear Concerned Student: I am not allowed in schools. Sincerely, God ---------------------------------------------------------- How did all this get started?... ----------------- Let's see, It possibly got started when Madeline Murray O'Hare complained she didn't want any prayer in our schools. And "we said", OK.. ------------------ Then, someone said you better not read the Bible in school, the Bible that says "thou shalt not kill, thou shalt not steal, and love your neighbors as yourself," And "we said", OK... ----------------- Dr. Benjamin Spock said we shouldn't spank our children when they misbehaved because their little personalities would be warped and we might damage their self-esteem. And "we said", an expert should know what he's talking about so we won't spank them anymore. ------------------ Then someone said teachers and principals better not discipline our children when they misbehave. And the school administrators said no faculty member in this school better touch a student when they misbehave because we don't want any bad publicity, and we surely don't want to be sued. And we accepted their reasoning... ------------------ Then someone said, let's let our daughters have abortions if they want, and they won't even have to tell their parents. And "we said", that's a grand idea... ------------------ Then some wise school board member said, since boys will be boys and they're going to do it anyway, let's give our sons all the condoms they want, so they can have all the fun they desire, and we won't have to tell their parents they got them at school. And "we said", that's another great idea... ------------------ Then some of our top elected officials said it doesn't matter what we do in private as long as we do our jobs. And "we said", it doesn't matter what anybody, including the President, does in private as long as we have jobs and the economy is good..... ------------------ And someone else took that appreciation a step further and published pictures of nude children and then stepped further still by making them available on the Internet. And "we said", everyone's entitled to free speech.... ------------------ And the entertainment industry said, let's make TV shows and movies that promote profanity, violence and illicit sex... And let's record music that encourages rape, drugs, murder, suicide, and satanic themes... And "we said", it's just entertainment and it has no adverse effect and nobody takes it seriously anyway, so go right ahead. ------------------ Now we're asking ourselves why our children have no conscience, why they don't know right from wrong, and why it doesn't bother them to kill strangers, classmates or even themselves. ------------------ Undoubtedly, if we thought about it long and hard enough, we could figure it out. I'm sure it has a great deal to do with... "WE REAP WHAT WE SOW," ------------------ Share This with Others, if you think it has merit! If not then just discard it... but if you discard this thought process, then don't you just sit back and complain about what bad things are going on in this country! ------------------ Now, my grandma has every right to believe whatever the hell she wants, but must she subject me to THAT?! (Oh, um, sorry for subjecting y'all to that... but my forthcoming rant needed context!) 1. God isn't allowed in schools? Huh, and yet "God is everywhere", right? There is a very good reason for keeping RELIGION out of public schools. This nation is based on the concept of freedom of religion, so it follows that there would be people who subscribe to every religion living here. There is no possible way to incorporate every religion into the school day without taking up the entire day, so why is it a big deal to expect parents to be responsible for the religious education of their children outside of public schools? 2. I have yet to see any evidence that spanking children makes them better human beings. There is quite a bit of evidence to the contrary, though, especially when adults spank children out of anger - not just to "discipline" them, but as an outlet for their rage. Hell yeah, I'd sue the school if a teacher hit my kid. There are plenty of other (positive) ways to discipline kids, especially those who are old enough to go to school. 3. Abortion is a horrible, heart-wrenching ordeal, and no girl should have to go through that alone. That said, I stand behind the right of every girl to make that decision for herself - there are situations in which having a child would be worse than having an abortion. If her parents are unable or unwilling to support her decision, she should be able to choose another person to support her. This crazy law making it illegal to aid a minor in obtaining an abortion is really detrimental to the girl in question. In effect, the lawmakers have seen it fit to remove any support system for a girl going through a serious trauma whose parents happen to disagree with her. How is that helpful to society? 4. Sex education (including free condoms) is essential in an age in which AIDS and other diseases are rampant. Most importantly, teaching responsibility for one's actions is essential. If parents are doing their jobs and teaching their children to take responsibility for their own actions, all the free condoms in the world won't make a kid have sex before he's ready to accept the responsibility for any consequences. Schools can (and do) try to teach responsibility in regards to sex, but they can't possibly be expected to take the place of 18 years of parenting in a semester-long class. 5. What people do in private is their own PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY. This does not mean that they should be allowed to hurt other people in private, which is why there are laws in place to prevent and punish the perpetrators of violent crimes. Last time I checked, people aren't actually allowed to create, possess, or distribute child pornography. Nobody's saying that's ok. However, if the president wants to get a blowjob in his office by someone who isn't his wife, that's not our problem. Granted, the office isn't generally the best place for an affair. However, unless it can be proven that his sex life is interfering with his ability to do his job, how is it our business? His choices are his responsibility, and he has to deal with the consequences (such as his wife being really angry with him, not such as spending millions of our tax dollars on a ridiculous impeachment). If we really want to impeach someone, how about the guy who lied about evidence of certain weapons in order to start a war that's really all about taking another country's resources and converting all those heathen fundamentalists to the "right" fundamentalism? Does it matter how many people are dying? Do any of those people matter? 6. Ah, the entertainment industry. Clearly it's all their fault that people like to escape from their boring, narrow little lives for a little excitement, right? Again, it comes down to personal responsibility. If you don't like to see violence on the big screen, then for the love of Xenu, don't go see it! You choose where to spend your money. If everyone thought the same way, and all people wanted was rainbows, butterflies, and unicorns that poop fluffy kittens, then that's what the entertainment industry would produce. If you want to see less anger, violence, sex, etc. in the entertainment that is available to everyone, then why don't you get off your ass and work for justice, peace, and stability for people who are struggling? Racism, classism, sexism, homophobia, and other types of bigotry are not going to go away on their own. Instead of criticizing society for using art to comment on and process life, why don't you do something to change the lives of the people around you? 7. If your children have no conscience, if they don't know right from wrong, and if it doesn't bother them to kill, it's YOUR FAULT. It is your responsibility as a parent to teach your children what is right, and above all, that everyone is worthy of respect, everyone matters, and everyone has a right to be here. That is my own conclusion - the Christian fundamentalist parents I grew up with never taught me that. I wonder why? Could it be that they were so focused on living according to a book written thousands of years ago that they missed the point of living here and now? 8. Yes, you do reap what you sow. See numbers 1-7. You may not be able to affect our entire society at once, but you can create change for the better in yourself, your family, and your community. Start at the source - yourself - before you try to change everyone else. If you're not the healthiest person you can be, then do what you can to transform yourself. When you do that, everything else will fall into place. For better or for worse, your words and actions will affect your family, their words and actions will affect your community, and your community will affect the world.