Okay, so the Naked Professor says we (the U.S.) should claim the Moon
and declare it the 51st state - which ought to really piss off the District
of Columbia. I think that D.C. and Puerto Rico deserve that status first.
So let's say we want to make the Moon the 53rd state...

There's a little thing called The Outer Space Treaty of 1967, a "Treaty on
principles governing the activities of states in the exploration and use of
outer space, including the moon and other celestial bodies."

It's a very idealistic piece of work. Kind of lofty. Check out some of the
contents:

"...INSPIRED by the great prospects opening up before mankind as a result
of man's entry into outer space, RECOGNIZING the common interest of all
mankind in the progress of the exploration and use of outer space for
peaceful purposes, BELIEVING that the exploration and use of outer space
should be carried on for the benefit of all peoples irrespective of the degree
of their economic or scientific development, DESIRING to contribute to
broad international co-operation in the scientific as well as the legal aspects
of the exploration and use of outer space for peaceful purposes, BELIEVING
that such co-operation will contribute to the development of mutual
understanding and to the strengthening of friendly relations between States
and peoples..."

Hmmm. Recognition. Belief. Desire. All about some sort of "one world"
unity, which i personally consider unrealistic. It's all very touchy-feely, but
it has no basis in the way people actually behave. That's why so many
people distrust the United Nations. Guess what? This Treaty serves the
United Nations:

"CONVINCED that a Treaty on Principles Governing the Activities of States in
the Exploration and Use of Outer Space, including the Moon and Other
Celestial Bodies, will further the Purposes and Principles of the Charter of
the United Nations..."

How are we ever going to achieve this:

"...the exploration and use of outer space, including the moon and other
celestial bodies, shall be carried out for the benefit and in the interests
of all countries, irrespective of their degree of economic or scientific
development, and shall be the province of all mankind."

How's THAT supposed to work? One country does all the work and splits
the goodies with the lazy stay-at-homes? I think that's the story of the
hen who baked the bread and couldn't get anyone to help pick the wheat
or chafe it, or roll the dough or bake it, but man when it came time to eat
the bread they all came running.

"...Outer space, including the moon and other celestial bodies, shall be
free for exploration and use by all States without discrimination of any
kind, on a basis of equality and in accordance with international law,
and there shall be free access to all areas of celestial bodies."

Okay, so let's say there's not. Let's say Russia won't let anybody land in Copernicus Crater? If America wants to land in Copernicus Crater, and
Russia says "Sorry, we're busy here. Pick another crater." They broke
the treaty. But wait: the Soviets were the ones who signed it, and they
don't exist any more. Is the treaty moot?

"...There shall be freedom of scientific investigation in outer space,
including the moon and other celestial bodies, and States shall facilitate
and encourage international co-operation in such investigation."

Well what if they don't? What if China finds some gold on the far side and
doesn't want to share? And they keep it secret? Why not? Then they'd
keep everyone away as long as possible, by whatever means.

"...Outer space, including the moon and other celestial bodies, is not
subject to national appropriation by claim of sovereignty, by means of use
or occupation, or by any other means."

Oops. That means the U.S. can't turn the Moon into another state. "Not
sujbect." Well it IS subject by occupation if it's occupied, isn't it?
Because an "idea" with a "declaration" isn't gonna stop a spacecraft from
landing. "...(everybody) shall carry on activities in the exploration and use
of outer space, including the moon and other celestial bodies, in
accordance with international law, including the Charter of the United
Nations, in the interest of maintaining international peace and security
and promoting international co-operation and understanding."

Yadda yadda yadda. Let's all sing a campfire song. The Professor is
right, let's not wait for the first extraterrestrial-international barroom
brawl. Screw it. Let's go. First come, first serve.

This Treaty goes on and on trying to make people NOT behave like
people, expecting endless amounts of patience and trustworthiness
and straightforwardness. It contains shallow statements like: "The
moon and other celestial bodies shall be used by all States Parties to
the Treaty exclusively for peaceful purposes." Yeah, except by Jesse
James and Jack the Ripper.

It's never been economic to deliver a nuke from space instead of on
an ICBM, but they forbid it anyway: "...undertake not to place in orbit
around the earth any objects carrying nuclear weapons or any other
kinds of weapons of mass destruction, install such weapons on celestial
bodies, or station such weapons in outer space in any other manner."

I've seen the Prof's post on the secret military moon base supposedly
set up after Apollo by Nixon. So according to rumor anyway, this next
part has already been broken: "...The establishment of military bases,
installations and fortifications, the testing of any type of weapons and
the conduct of military manoeuvres on celestial bodies shall be
forbidden."

Let's write to our congressmen, it's time to give notice. We can get out
of the Treaty but it takes a year: "Party to the Treaty may give notice
of its withdrawal from the Treaty one year after its entry into force by
written notification to the Depositary Governments. Such withdrawal shall
take effect one year from the date of receipt of this notification. Article
XVII This Treaty, of which the Chinese, English, French, Russian and
Spanish texts are equally authentic, shall be deposited in the archives
of the Depositary Governments."

If this Treaty were enforced seriously, any nutcase could set up shop on
the Moon and soon there would be chaos leading to destruction: "The
use of military personnel for scientific research or for any other peaceful
purposes shall not be prohibited. The use of any equipment or facility
necessary for peaceful exploration of the moon and other celestial bodies
shall also not be prohibited."

"Peaceful" is a pretty broad term.

And it goes on to say that nations can boss around any other entities
that get spacey ideas. Governments can boss corporations. Even if
the corporation is richer and stronger than the government. According
to the Treaty.

Nuts to the stoneage rhetoric. I'm getting behind the movement. Right
after we get D.C. and Puerto Rico up on the flag, first. Otherwise we're
gonna have the biggest turd in the universe hanging over our heads.