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Hi I think this might help me sort out my feelings a little bit .. will be glad to have input from anyone ! thanks
Thoughtful
posted on Oct 12, 2009
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I am watching him sleep. Then i realize that the only time I am ok is when I am with him . Every day that I have to be away from him is a struggle a cry and to wonder where he is and what he is doing and if this career is worth all those precious moment... read entire post
Thoughtful
posted on Aug 09, 2009
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Guess it was too good to be true. That one amazing reconcilaation lead to two weeks of peaceful bliss even though we were apart we were together and he was mine again. Nothing else mattered. Then out of the blue , I get a text. It says tha... read entire post
Thoughtful
posted on Jul 13, 2009
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I am never going to forget that moment. It is absolutely engraved in my stubborn head. That moment when the world stopped cause I seen you look into my eyes and I knew I could relax because for the most part nothing had changed. The million miles that se... read entire post
Thoughtful
posted on May 28, 2009
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ouuu you want me to be happy jus not with you ? thats nice that ring meant nothing to you and now ..its all my fault cus we could beeen fine ..could you make me want to fucking die any more. its not bad enough i have to live with this constant fucin fee... read entire post
Thoughtful
posted on May 10, 2009
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I spent all my time focusing on hating you for the time we did not spend together. I never looked at how much you did for me and the time you did spend with me. I was so inappareciative and now seeing how permanant forevr is .. those months away seem so... read entire post
Thoughtful
posted on Mar 04, 2009
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innoncence is most dfinatly bliss. I mean all the magical things of childhood seem so amazing so new and exciting. They build you up for this big amazing life only to let you down one by one ; the tooth fairy, easter bunny and santa claus. Then you begin... read entire post
Thoughtful
posted on Jan 23, 2009
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I would love to see the light in this black tunnell.maybe someone can point it out for me .. probably not though.
I tried to be positive look forward to the time we do have together,
thus the stupid military once again raped me of tha... read entire post
Thoughtful
posted on Jan 22, 2009
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freedom democracy blah blah blah... read entire post
Thoughtful
posted on Jan 22, 2009
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SIgh .. feels like i have been doing this alot .. i mean ALOT lately. Its jus that i feel like i cant get all this stuff right .. its flying at me in sLOW motion if that makes sense ? I FINALLY made peace with fiances mother .. now its him that i need to... read entire post
Thoughtful
posted on Dec 06, 2008
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everything i believe in is a lie .. i feel so fake so phony so angry at the world for telling me all these false truths and then slowly but surely asserting with an evil laugh that hey this world is cruel it is injust and you jus can not do anything abou... read entire post
Thoughtful
posted on Dec 03, 2008
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Is is okay to cry ?Is it okay to scream?
I am so alone and noone can help me.
Is it okay to hate ?
or maybe plot your murder?
Cause as extreme as it sounds my life woudl be so much better without you.
I want yo... read entire post
Thoughtful
posted on Dec 03, 2008
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i am sick of waiting .. sick of playing these stupid games ... sick of you making me angry and then hanging up before i have the chance to yell at you.. sick of you giving me shit but me never being able to give you a piece of my mind. I am tired o... read entire post
Thoughtful
posted on Dec 02, 2008
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:( I am so lonely :( .. I really jus want to have someone here but the one person I am allowed to have her to make me happy cant be. It's wrong to think of someone else when you already have someone. Its even one of the commandments "thou shalt not commi... read entire post
Thoughtful
posted on Nov 26, 2008
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I want us to look at each other like on that movie .. but i cant cause your not here
I want you to hold me like you used to and to feel comfortable and happy again
but i cant cause your not here
I dont want to feel jealous and hat... read entire post
Thoughtful
posted on Mar 08, 2008
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you dont matter to me anymore , its so nice to say i love you again in person and not have to miss her . Shes not a neice shes a sister and i love her more then anything in this world i hate the way things are and i wish that the family never had to be s... read entire post