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Gypsyheart's blog - subscribe This is place for my feelings, all of them, the good the bad and the ugly. I'm not here to make a statement. I'm here to make sense of my life.

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Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything's okay and everything's going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up
In your face...
Today would have been our 11th anniversary of dating. I have seen my husband once since the year began....
I was woken up this morning at the door bell ringing at 4am. Crouched on my doorstep was my husband. He had decided to overdose on Vicodin and what ever else was in his med chest....
So much is going on in my life right now....
A question about infidelity....
In the desire to find a new partner I'm trying to put together a list of requisites or standards. I'm also afraid that they might be too unrealistic....
I realized that I was lonely.
I have spent so many years hiding my hurt and my insecurities....
I realized today how lonely I am....
I survived the other night. I reached my epiphany the next morning. My mood is on an upswing....
I'm reaching out. Even if it is online.
I'm suicidal again...
Is it me? Is it my fault that I let people into my heart? Is that why it hurts so much when they decide to rip themselves out?...
The depression has been building for a while. I've seen it coming, tried to ward it off. I don't remember being this depressed in high school....
deep breath
exhale
I'm having trouble breathing. There's a tightness in my chest and a ball in my stomach.
I guess the reality of it can't be put off....
I feel as if I'm in a storm at sea....
I'm feeling a little lost and disconnected....
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